Yes, the community that screams at you for being a TERF, or "Trans-Exclusionary Radical Feminist" if you don't want boys hanging out in your teenage daughter's locker room or find it odd that men are now permitted to compete against women in sports, suddenly has a problem with drunk twenty-something women hanging out at a gay bar for the evening.

While gay men have long complained about straight women holding bachelorette parties in gay bars, two researchers say that the celebrations are a form of "hetrification" that is actively destroying LGBTQ safe spaces.

Margaritas are violence!!!

In case you are wondering what "hetrification" means, it doesn't. That is, it's a made-up word that does not exist beyond the minds of the researchers.

Like gentrification, hetrification occurs when people feel privileged to take over the spaces of others…

Incidentally I use the term "researchers" very loosely.

In fact, as you explore what passes for research, the headline of the article becomes increasingly comical.

"Science says…"

Really?

No, not that science. He was merely a useful idiot. They mean "Science, Copyright 2020, All rights reserved."

This Science™ has less to do with testing theories and gathering data, and more to do with supporting leftist policy agendas.

In fact, they aren't even trying anymore.

Two researchers — Laurie Essig, a professor of gender, sexuality, and feminist studies at Middlebury College in Vermont, and Vincent Jones II, a professor of community health at York College in New York…

Let's just stop there for a moment.

I'm not big on credentialism in that I've known Ivy League graduates dumber than a bag of wrenches, and electricians smart enough to do anything they wanted but preferred the freedom of being their own boss, but since the left likes to play that game, we will too.

First up is Laurie Essig, a professor of gender, sexuality, and feminist studies at Middlebury College in Vermont.

What do we know about Middlebury College?

They're #1!!!

In snowboarding.

Okay, they are also well-regarded academically (loosely defined), routinely ranking in the top ten of small liberal arts schools. But what does Middlebury say about themselves?

This.

Global thinker. Bridge Builder. Advocate. Activist. Environmentalist. Trailblazer. Adventurer. Collaborator. If that's who you are — or who you want to become — then Middlebury is where you belong.

This sounds less like an academic institution and more like a woke Outward Bound Camp for your troubled teenage daughter.

What of Laura Essig?

Her bio from Middlebury:

Laurie Essig is a sociologist who teaches courses on Heterosexuality, White People, Freakishness and Feminist Blogging.

Sounds rigorous. I understand Albert Einstein considered his greatest blunder to be not taking into account Freakishness in his theory of general relativity.

Unfortunately, Essig teaches a number of courses. Let's start with the one titled, "White People"

White people did not just appear out of nowhere. Instead, they are the result of a long history of structural and everyday racism that was always intertwined with class, sex, sexuality, and nation... Finally, we will look at the formation of whiteness today as a site of privilege, aggrieved entitlement, and violence.

Essig is white herself, and I always wonder what demons these people are trying to expel to engage in such self-hatred.

How about a course on "Decolonizing Porn," asked no one ever?

In this course we will use feminist, queer, critical race, and decolonial theories to analyze porn in Europe and the Americas. The goal is to give students the analytic tools they need to think deeply about the centrality of porn to our lives and to global capitalism

Ummm… you know, maybe some of this stuff is best left between you and your therapist. Really, you don't have to turn your every errant neurosis into a course.

And then there's, "Sociology of Heterosexuality."

Most people believe that heterosexuality is natural or rooted in biology…

Yes, yes they do.

If only there were some explanation for why that would be. Well, other than it is the foundational principle upon which rests our entire species.

…and so never look very closely at it as a product of culture. In this course we will examine the artifacts, institutions, rituals, and ideologies that construct heterosexuality and the heterosexual person in American culture.

There is no "heterosexual person" in American culture that needs constructing. It's the biological norm. It's why we're here. We don't need to treat homosexuals like infants by suggesting heterosexuality is merely a social construct and to do so is demeaning and condescending.

In case you need more proof that Essig is a deeply unhappy and perpetually aggrieved woman, she wrote a book, "Love, Inc.: Dating Apps, the Big White Wedding, and Chasing the Happily Neverafter."

Here is the Amazon description.

Keep in mind, this is intended to get you to purchase this book.

The notion of "happily ever after" has been ingrained in many of us since childhood — meet someone, date, have the big white wedding…

She really needs to talk to someone.

…and enjoy your well-deserved future. But why do we buy into this idea? Is love really all we need?

Author Laurie Essig invites us to flip this concept of romance on its head and see it for what it really is — an ideology that we desperately cling to as a way to cope with the fact that we believe we cannot control or affect the societal, economic, and political structures around us.

Imagine for a moment, getting stuck sitting next to Essig on a cross-country flight.

From climate change to nuclear war, white nationalism to the worship of wealth and conspicuous consumption — as the future becomes seemingly less secure,…

This, from a college professor living during an age of unprecedented abundance and freedom.

…Americans turn away from the public sphere and find shelter in the private. Essig argues that when we do this, we allow romance to blind us to the real work that needs to be done — building global movements that inspire a change in government policies to address economic and social inequality.

Therapy. So. Much. Therapy.

What of her co-researcher, Vincent Jones II, a professor of community health at York College in New York?

Jones is a graduate of Middlebury, likely where he met Essig, maybe even took her course on "Men and Masculinities" where she explains that

"...we will then trace these late 19th century men and masculinities into our current moment of political machismo, trolling misogyny,…"

No wonder why he wanted to team up with her! She's probably a laugh riot during coffee breaks!

In any case, there is not much on Vincent. He does have a series of education degrees and a focus on health education.

His published articles include "A content analysis of TikTok videos focused on racial discrimination against Asians…" and his areas of expertise include "Health on mobile dating apps" which makes me think he spends more time on his iPhone than my 12-year-old.

In any case, these are the people who have been imbued by the media as embodying Science itself, so let's turn back to that.

Many gay bars popped up after the white gentrification of Black and Latinx neighborhoods, they wrote, but hetrification is different because it's "an appropriation not just of space, but of culture."

I see, gay bars popping up in white neighborhoods after the black and Latinos had been kicked out is not an appropriation of culture but bachelorette parties in those very same bars is because… just because.

Many of female bachelorette party attendees see themselves as allies of the LGBTQ community because they are welcome in queer spaces and familiar with queer pop culture, like yelling "Yass queen!" and singing along to Cher.

I love the casual stereotyping that the Left seems so comfortable with.

Singing along with Cher? I've sang along with Cher. I had no idea I was appropriating anything other than a sense of good taste.

But, "just after several drinks, many may grab the butt of a cute gay man or take selfies in front of the leather daddies as if they were exhibits in some queer zoo," the researchers wrote.

No, they're drunk. They're doing what drunk people do, which are drunk things.

Only someone with WAY too many degrees would think anything else.

"Worse than their post-homophobic homophobia,…

"Post-homophobic homophobia" is another way of saying that no matter what you do, what you think and what you say, you will always be a homophobe so shut up.

…when we asked the bridal parties if anyone in their group was lesbian, bisexual, or trans, they answered with a rather stunned ‘I have no idea' as if women's queerness was a topic best not broached," the professors wrote. "

"As if"?!

Why use data and dispassionate observations when you can use your own biases and prejudices instead!

The women were not stunned by the question because the topic is "best not broached," they were stunned because like normally well-adjusted human beings, they don't make sexual orientation the center of their existence.

Some more Science coming at ya!

One bisexual woman in Provincetown…

One.

Do you really need more than one data point to draw broad conclusions regarding the behavior of an entire demographic?

…said that she was often treated with revulsion by these women, taking her back to her high school days. ‘These were the same people who would have bullied me in high school. Now they want to come to our party?'"

This one women they interviewed clearly has unresolved issues because none of these clueless drunk bachelorettes have any idea what she's talking about.

…The women the researchers interviewed never discussed transphobia...

Because why would they? They're not transphobes. They wouldn't go to an LGBTQ bar if they were. They might have been snotty, that would be unsurprising, but there's a reason research has to be carefully designed so as to eliminate all this extraneous confounding baggage.

In short, the women had an offensively superficial understanding of the challenges still facing queer people.

Say the people who assert that singing along with Cher is a sign of queer culture.

To come into queer spaces and actually believe that we live in a post-homophobic world is a kind of hostile occupation."

"Hostile occupation," in which you pay to be there.

Sounds more like a rental to me.

And a lucrative one at that.

Drag queens told the researchers that bachelorette parties are their main source of income, with fewer members of the LGBTQ+ community attending the shows.

So, let's destroy drag queen's main source of income in the name of equity.

That will show those affluent white women!

Hetrification weaponizes heteronormativity and breaks down queer spaces," they added. "The incessant visitation of heteronormative misconduct slowly diminishes the integrity of the space … [leaving venues] at risk of being disabled as safe havens for the LGBTQ+ community."

But also profitable, in fact, there very well might be fewer spaces if the bachelorette income were to dry up.

The issue Essig and Jones describe isn't merely academic navel-gazing. The number of gay bars in the U.S. declined by 37 percent between 2007 and 2019, according to a study cited in The Washington Post. The number of lesbian bars declined by 52 percent during the same period. The COVID pandemic has caused many more to shut down too.

The researchers treat this as an unsolved mystery of sorts.

It's real simple:

Gays are largely welcome in general in most public spaces these days.

Glad I could clear up that conundrum for them.

To return to the headline for a moment, this is the "science" we are supposed to rely on:

In their op-ed, Essig and Jones didn't share details about their research methodology, like how many queer spaces they observed or the data they used to reach their conclusions. As such, it's unclear whether what they observed in Provincetown represents a national or worldwide trend.

This was an op-ed. This wasn't even a research paper never mind a peer-reviewed one as far as I can tell.

And it looked only at Provincetown.

I've been to Provincetown. There was an old joke that half the residents were Portuguese fishermen, and the other half were gay, and all the Portuguese fishermen were out to sea.

That's Provincetown, the place where my wife and I were called "breeders."

That's the place that's threatened by drunk white chicks?

This is science the way Taco Bell is a Mexican restaurant.

And I'm being unkind to Taco Bell.

This was a hateful unhappy women dragging along this poor man unfortunate enough to have attended her classes so they could hang around gay bars for a weekend, talk to a handful of people, and then write an Op-Ed, the conclusion of which was prepared well ahead of time.

Science, real science that is, says....

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