For the trans activists who have watched in dismay as their narrative has crumbled before their eyes, here comes the cavalry to the rescue!

Too bad for them it's F-Troop.

No matter, the media powers were all too eager to fall in line and report on the survey as if it were a legitimate study sponsored by dispassionate researchers interested in pursuing the truth and not a marketing piece sponsored by The National Center for Transgender Equality (NCTE) a self-proclaimed advocacy group interested in pursuing a narrative.

It had to be legit, right? Why, it was the "biggest survey ever!"

The Guardian clearly can't get enough of this having published a different survey last year which showed only 78% were happier.

Why, trans people are getting happier by the minute!

Interestingly, that older survey was made up of nearly two-thirds of people who called themselves "trans non-binary" or "trans gender-nonconforming" meaning... what? You transitioned to not a gender? Is that a half trans? What if you trans from non-binary to gender-nonconforming? Are you transtrans?

Don't worry, they are as confused as you are.

Moreover, less than a third were on hormone therapy and half that had had surgery, meaning the vast majority of respondents were playing dress-up more than anything else.

No matter, this latest super-scientific survey ups the ante in the endless race to be the most supportive.

How super-scientific was it?

It employed that gold standard of all surveys:

The celebrity endorsement.

And not just any celebrity endorsement, but endorsements from celebrities with an enormous pro-trans following.

The US Trans Survey is LIVE! If you are a trans person over the age of 16, go to ustranssurvey.org and take the survey now.

When it comes to data integrity, you can keep your random probability sampling; give me an Instagram post targeting people who already agree with you any day.

And yes, 16 is the cutoff, two years younger than the last NCTE survey.

The study included individuals aged 16 and older at the time of survey completion.

The smart money says it will be even lower the next time.

I downloaded the preliminary results available via PDF.

The survey was supported by a number of trans advocacy groups all divided and categorized by race because if you aren't practicing overt segregation, you're doing intersectionality wrong.

And you're a racist, but that's assumed.

They were careful to reach out to a broad array of groups representing everybody from those who support the cause wholeheartedly, to those who support the cause even more wholeheartedly.

The outreach period began approximately one year before the survey launch, and the outreach team used various strategies to connect with transgender people through multiple points of access, such as through transgender - or LGBTQ -, support groups, health centers, and online communities.

The people hanging around the groups that explicitly support the trans industrial complex are probably not the ones who either regret their transition or have already detransitioned.

It would be like running a survey about abortion targeting Planned Parenthood members or a poll on putting pineapple on pizza by only asking psychopaths.

You're going to get the result you wanted.

Throughout the outreach period, the team conducted a survey pledge campaign, which was among the most important methods for engaging and communicating with potential respondents.

Just to be crystal clear: They recruited the most committed advocates to pledge fealty to the cause and recruit the like-minded.

This wasn't a study. This was a pep rally.

The campaign invited potential participants and allies to pledge to take the survey and/or spread the word about the survey.

And allies? Hold that thought for just a second.

The survey was anonymous, and maintaining privacy and confidentiality in the collection and maintenance of survey data was an important component of preserving participants' anonymity.

Anonymous? So ... anyone could take the survey, including "allies" eager to support the cause?

I swear, could this survey get any more legitimate? All it needs now is a sweepstakes!

As an incentive to complete the survey, participants were offered the opportunity to enter into a random drawing for one of three cash prizes upon completion of the survey, including one $500 cash prize and two $250 cash prizes.

The report didn't mention what percentage were taking hormones, had surgery, or unhappy childhoods (that last one was 46% in the Washington Post survey). Not to worry!

A detailed description of the methodology will be included in the full report of the 2022 U.S. Transgender Survey.

After the headlines, attention, and scrutiny die down.

I have no idea what percentage of trans people are happier following their transition, and this survey certainly doesn't tell me either. It is comically bad and corrupt from the start. That our alleged watchdogs in the media would slavishly report on it as if it was anything other than a slickly produced advertising brochure tells you everything you need to know about them.

Look, if you're going to gaslight me, at least show me some respect and make it look half believable.

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