Florida woman Cynthia Sosa was driving along when a chicken stepped out in front of her to cross the road.
While she waited for the chicken to make its way across, the car behind her started honking impatiently.
Sosa ignored them.
Just as the chicken passed the halfway point, the car behind her sped into the other lane and turned the chicken into hillbilly delight.
With her answer to the existential question of our generation ripped from her grasp, Sosa did the most logical thing anyone could think to do.
She drove off after the chicken-killer. Blocking the other woman's car in, she jumped out, forced open her door, and sprayed her in the face with bear mace.
BEAR MACE.
Sosa told police she followed DeMiller's car ‘because she was angry that DeMiller [allegedly] had killed a chicken. Sosa said she ‘wanted to teach [DeMiller] a lesson.'
The chicken killer told a much different story.
Perla Vidaure DeMiller and Sherly Colemen told police they were on their way to pick up DeMiller's child from daycare when a black car blocked the road on Petronia Street. DeMiller reportedly honked to try to get around the black car, and then passed it. While continuing to her destination, she noticed the black car following her.
Notice the lack of a chicken in this version of the story. After that it's pretty much the same, but from DeMiller and Colemen's perspective, Sosa was less Chicken Avenger and more Crazy Bear Spray Lady.
Either way, the police saw her as a criminal, and Sosa was charged with two counts of aggravated battery and one count of burglary with assault or battery.
The report doesn't say what the "burglary" charge was, but presumably it was stealing people's hearts, because there's quite a movement calling Sosa a hero.
And on it goes.
There was even a crowdfunding campaign for her, but GoFundMe shut it down because of their whole "you can't raise funds for legal defense" policy.
It's kind of crazy when people out there are more upset about a wayward chicken getting flattened than a couple of ladies taking a dose of bear spray to the face.
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