It's not an invasion, you guys, I promise. It is pure coincidence that a Venezuelan gang is now recruiting migrants in New York City to help them with their new string of smartphone thefts that have plagued the city. In fact, I'm probably just spreading right-wing propaganda by revealing to you this factual story.

Crime is down, you guys. Crime is down. So don't worry too much about this story.

It's a crime wave that has raised fears across the city: robbers on mopeds snatching people's phones from their hands and speeding off.

Sounds like a story out of South America.

Gee, I wonder why that is ...

After the phones are stolen, the victims' bank accounts are drained of cash, with fraudulent transactions in both the US and South America, and the phones themselves are sent to Colombia to be wiped, reprogrammed and sold.

Now The Post can disclose that the pattern of robberies is being linked by law enforcement to a brutal Venezuelan gang that is sending its members to New York as part of the migrant wave — and using its sprawling criminal empire to launder the proceeds of the crimes.

The gang is called Tren de Aragua, and you'll probably be called a conspiracy theorist if you bring them up to your liberal friends, so maybe wait a few weeks until they get the news too — then you can talk about it.

The New York Post drew up this diagram for us so let's take a looksie:

Again, not an invasion at our southern border. This is just the price we pay for freedom.

Here is just one of those robberies:

[Warning: Graphic]

You may be wondering what they do with those phones.

NYPD Chief of Detectives Joe Kenny said the alleged suspects are part of a 'sophisticated criminal enterprise' made up of recently arrived immigrants.

[Ringleader Victor] Parra, who cops said entered the US in 2023, would send specific orders to henchmen in his 14-member crew detailing the kind of phone he was looking for.

'Parra will blast out a message via WhatsApp that he is looking for phones,' Kenny said. 'And then the text will say, "I have money, I'm available, go get 'em.'"

Scooter drivers make $100 a day, and the actual phone snatcher could make $300 to $600 per stolen device, according to cops.

Once he had the phones in hand, Parra would have a hacker break into financial or banking apps so they could make fraudulent buys, Kenny said.

After they'd cleaned out their victim, Parra would send the phone to buyers in cities like Miami or Houston — or foreign countries like Colombia or Venezuela, police officials said.

So not only do you get your phone stolen, but if you don't cancel all your accounts they'll be drained too.

Cool. Glad to see this is where we're at in Joe Biden's America.

Oh, and look at this, it looks like Tren de Aragu might team up with MS-13 soon, so that's good.

These people are flooding our country, and the establishment wants us to think J6ers are the ones we should be scared of. I'm just gonna go ahead and say it: Democrats are the ones who are the conspiracy theorists.

Crazy times, people.

But what a time to be alive!

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