Alert: Pine trees are now racist

Apr 6th

A high school in Portland (where else?) delayed the confirmation of its new team name because it's worried trees might be racist:

The Portland school board was concerned – very concerned – that Ida B. Wells High School would associate itself with racism if it changed its mascot to the "Evergreens."


Because trees are associated with lynching, that's why!!

"I'm wondering if there was any concern with the imagery there, in using a tree… as our mascot?" asked Portland Public Schools Board of Education Director Michelle DePass at a meeting. "I think everyone comes with blind spots and I think that might've been a really big blind spot."

Can you imagine how actually racist you are if you see the world so exclusively through skin tone that you look at a tree and think of racism?

Talk about blind spots!

Another board member had to mansplain to Michelle that evergreens were not typically used as "lynching trees."

(They are associated with a VERY white dude tho)

We should probably cut down all the evergreen trees... just to be safe.

P.S. While you're here you should check out our latest video: "Culture warrior Barack Obama is back with more fake outrage" πŸ‘‡

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