Apple's new crash detection system was rolled out for the iPhone 14 and the latest Apple watch, and it was billed as a measure to keep an owner safe by detecting whether they had been in a serious car crash and even more impressively, alerting authorities that its owner was unresponsive.

If the phone's accelerometer detects a massive change in velocity and orientation, it will robo-dial 911.

There is at least one account of the feature working as intended, contacting first responders of a car crash that unfortunately killed 6 people in Lincoln, NE.

However, there is another thing that can take a person through all all those same movements: a roller coaster.

A roller coaster mimics the exact movements Apple's developers associated with a car crash, so guess what iPhone 14 users are finding after a fun jaunt on the rickety train of doom at their local amusement parks.

That's right. First responders showing up, looking for the emergency.

So far Apple is staying mum on the whole debacle, but this isn't the only issue Apple's health features have had.

A study in the American Medical Informatics Association found that the Apple Watch's heart rate monitor only correctly identified a medically actionable atrial fibrillation in 30 out of 264 ER visits attributed to the watch's monitoring system.

I guess it's not such a smart device after all, is it?