Bet you never wanted to read the phrase "anal swab testing" ever again, did ya?
· Jan 24, 2022 ·

Well, too bad!

China has brought back its "undignified" anal Covid swabs just two weeks before the Beijing Winter Olympics begin.'

The Communist regime claims the virus test — which involves inserting a 5cm long saline-soaked swab up a patient's bum and rotating it — is more accurate than other on-the-spot virus tests.

You may think this is a violation of decency and human rights, but I've been told if a government mandates something in the name of "public health," it's important that you just pull down your pants and do as you're told.

Japan is calling on China to stop using the "undignified" test as some passengers said it caused them "psychological distress".

China allegedly ordered American diplomats to undergo anal tests sparking a row with the State Department.

Beijing has denied the claims but Washington has slammed the tests as "undignified."

Testing via the derriere was reportedly brought back after Beijing saw its first case of the dreaded Omicron sniffles. It is not (for now) being required of international visitors.

Chinese newspaper The Beijing News said at least 27 people underwent the anal swab tests at an apartment building in Beijing where a 26-year-old woman had caught Omicron — the city's first recorded case of the variant.

The horror! Someone get that woman some tissues and Tylenol! She's going to suffer through the three to five days of a mild-to-moderate head cold.

This totally justifies the government forcing people to bend over in the name of public health!

But hey, since it's a communist dictatorship, the subjects of Beijing should be just happy they aren't hamsters.

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