In the world of Bill Gates conspiracies, this one isn't.
The iconic tech entrepreneur used to be all about bettering the world through getting rid of malaria and improving third world education.
Now he wants you to only eat "synthetic" beef because he is rich and therefore knows better than you.
Gates – who coincidentally is a primary investor in a synthetic meat company called Memphis Meats and has financial ties with other plant-based companies – wants the U.S. and other "rich nations" to eat only lab-grown meat.
The Microsoft founder made the comments during an interview with MIT where he discussed his new book, "How to Avoid Climate Disaster."
"I do think all rich countries should move to 100% synthetic beef. You can get used to the taste difference, and the claim is they're going to make it taste even better over time. Eventually, that green premium is modest enough that you can sort of change the [behavior of] people or use regulation to totally shift the demand."
Did you hear that? The government will either entice you with monetary incentives or force you, but gosh darn it, you're going to eat cloned meat from a lab or else!
Gates also lamented all the methane produced by those farting cows that are destroying the planet:
"There are all the things where they feed them different food, like there's this one compound that gives you a 20% reduction [in methane emissions]. But sadly, those bacteria [in their digestive system that produce methane] are a necessary part of breaking down the grass. And so I don't know if there'll be some natural approach there. I'm afraid the synthetic [protein alternatives like plant-based burgers] will be required for at least the beef thing."
There used to be 30-60 million bison that naturally roamed North America before people arrived. We have about 94 million domesticated cattle in the U.S. I guess it was a good thing people nearly hunted those wild bison herds to extinction for the sake of the planet, or else we'd really be in trouble from bovines breaking wind!
Fun fact: although not popular, there are scientists who believe it was our ancestors' slaughter of native grazing herds that have literally created deserts. In such a theory, we need more farting cows, not less, accompanied by good land management.
Yet Bill Gates wants to get rid of the cattle and have you eat only meat from a lab.
Oh, and Gates is also now the largest owner of farmland in America. I'm sure that's for our own good as well.
Again, I'm sure this has nothing to do with Gates's financial ties to companies that grow cloned protein and fat cells. I'm also sure that this process of building massive meat laboratories to feed the world is totally more eco-friendly and natural than cows.
It's sCiEnCe, kids!
