In another story that makes me question the very world in which I live, Kentucky Fried Chicken and Crocs have collaborated on a project that defies the very laws of nature. If the neighbors of ancient Israel had thought up this type of abomination, I can safely say it would have been restricted under Mosaic Law.

Seriously, I don't even know where to go with this one. Do I make fun of people who still wear crocs? Do I vomit at the thought of having feet that smell like chicken? Do I point out the unhinged, attention-grabbing insanity of KFC, no doubt feeling threatened by the heavenly concoctions coming out of the kitchens at Chick-Fil-A and Popeyes?

Perhaps I should stick with the fact that really threatens my sanity: these things sold out in 30 minutes flat. There was not only an abundance of people willing to shell out $60 for KFC footwear, but many actually waited in line on the site for their chance to be a part of fast-food history. Sadly, many customers were sent away emptyhanded. Take the heartbreaking example of Shannon:

As is common with products that should have never been made, there was an instant imbalance in supply and demand, leading to $500 Ebay listings within minutes.

If this absolutely crazy situation should remind us of anything, it's the fundamental power and principles of economics. Perhaps lawmakers like AOC could learn a thing or two from the Colonel's crocs (if she ever stops getting tangled in her shoelaces, that is).

Good job, Colonel Sanders. You've found yet another way to abuse God's blessing of fried chicken!