Florida Priest Says He Bit Woman To Protect Communion Bread
· May 24, 2024 · NottheBee.com

Holy Florida man, y'all!

In this case, literally.

A priest at St. Thomas Aquinas Church in St. Cloud, Florida allegedly bit a woman during a fight in the middle of Holy Communion when the woman apparently tried to grab the Communion elements away from the administering priest.

It could only happen in Florida!

You can watch the video or scroll down for the deets:

... a woman 'came through Father Fidel Rodriguez's Holy Communion line and appeared unaware of the proper procedure,' according to a statement released by the Diocese of Orlando.

'After a brief exchange with the woman, it was determined that she was neither prepared nor disposed to participate in Communion,' read the statement. 'Father Rodriguez gave the woman a blessing and advised her to receive the Sacrament of Penance (Confession) before coming back to receive Holy Communion (Eucharist).'

Here's how it started: This woman came to 10 a.m. Mass and apparently tried to grab the Communion wafer out of the tray. That's pretty standard at non-Catholic churches, but no Catholic on the planet would do it that way. You hold out your hands and the priest (or assistants called the Eucharistic ministers) either places the wafer in your hands or in your mouth.

'He wouldn't give me the cookie. I don't know if it was the way I was dressed, or if it is what I like,' the woman said.

The cookie?? What?

Only those baptized and confirmed in the Roman Catholic Church or churches "fully united" with Rome (mostly eastern rite Catholic churches in Eastern Europe and the Middle East) can take Communion. This priest was wary and didn't let her take the elements.

So she did what anyone would do: She showed back up two hours later (and apparently had someone film her)!

Father Rodriguez asked the woman if she had been to confession after the first incident and she told him that it was none of his business.

I'm not a Catholic, but apparently neither is this lady if she thinks that it's none of the priest's business if she has received the Sacrament of Penance.

It's literally his business.

But, you know, they have procedures for everything in the church, so the priest was prepared to compromise.

But that's when all H-E-Double-Hockey-Sticks broke loose.

'Father Rodriguez offered the woman Holy Communion on the tongue,' church officials said. 'At that point, the woman forcefully placed her hand in the vessel and grabbed some sacred Communion hosts, crushing them.'

WHAT WAS SHE TRYING TO DO??

Having only one hand free, Father Rodriguez struggled to restrain the woman as she refused to let go of the hosts. When the woman pushed him and reacting to a perceived act of aggression, Father Rodriguez bit her hand so she would let go of the hosts she grabbed.

The woman was immediately asked to leave, according to the Diocese of Orlando's statement.

I wasn't there, but going full Mike Tyson that quickly is WILD!

Considering Catholic dogma and the sanctity of Holy Communion, Father Rodriguez seems to have been doing his duty to protect the dignity of the sacrament (which is seen as the literal body and blood of Christ).

Police are investigating the incident. We'll let you know if any charges are filed.

We've said it once, and we've said it a thousand times: Don't mess with Florida man!

Even if he's a priest.


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