Usually, when the inexplicable lights start showing up in the sky across the planet, you know you're about nine minutes away from the start of an alien invasion. It's just scientific fact.
The "experts," meanwhile, would have us believe there's nothing at all to worry about here:
Multiple people spotted a mysterious beam of light in the sky last week. The "red flare", as many described it, was spotted by people in Houston and other places throughout the world. While the strange red flare might give off extraterrestrial vibes due to its mystery, the phenomenon was most likely nothing quite as extraordinary, some say.
Yeah, "some say" the phenomenon was totally ordinary so just look away and don't think about it.
How much do you think the aliens are paying them?
Apparently the light is something to do with "ice crystals" or something:
While some have had some interesting theories as to what the mysterious beam of light is, many have attributed the red flare to a light pillar. Light pillars appear when lights move through ice crystals in the sky. It creates a beam-like look of light that shoots up into the sky.
"Ice crystals," eh? You tell me: Does this look like ice crystals?
I mean... I guess it could be ice crystals at high elevation. Could be anything, really. Who's to say?
I know what I choose to believe, though.
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