National Review Makes The Conservative Case For Naming Ships After Gay Men Who Like Teen Boys

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Joel Abbott

Jun 5, 2025

Ladies and gentlemen, I regret to inform you that National Review is being National Review again.

Just amazing. No way The Babylon Bee can compete with reality.

From the article (yes, it's real!):

A hard-boiled conservative in the laissez-faire capitalist mold, Harvey and (his lover) Jack spent much of the fall of 1964 rising early so they could distribute Barry Goldwater leaflets in New York City subways.

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"Harvey and his gay teen lover liked the free-market and handed out Republican pamphlets for Barry Goldwater, so he was conservative."

I can't stop laughing!

There's so many meme opportunities here.

Here is their conclusion:

Stripping the ship of the only name it has ever had would be a retrograde move and needlessly exacerbate divisions in the armed forces. President Trump has taken an ax to counterproductive DEI government programs, but he has always exhibited an urbanite's tolerance toward gays

Alternative:

The National Review is out here arguing that Harvey Milk, who started sodomizing a 16- to 17-year-old boy named Jack Galen McKinley when Milk was 33 years old, is a conservative because he didn't like taxes and wanted free markets.

The only criticism they have is for Pete Hegseth, a conservative Christian veteran who wants to remove LGBT sex ideology from the military. They have no criticism, meanwhile, of Joe Biden for allowing the oiler ship to be christened (by a transgender naval officer, no less) for the expressed purpose of honoring a pedophile's love of and fight for gay sex.

"Harvey Milk was a patriot."

What a bunch of clowns.


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