With egg prices up, the effects of inflation, and other shortages, you might not have noticed that the price of chocolate is through the roof.
But if you have a sweetheart who loves them some chocolate, you've probably noticed a few trends -- mainly price hikes -- in the chocolate aisle as we approach St. Valentine's Day.
And NBC News knows exactly what to blame:
From the article:
The price of raw cocoa, chocolate's key ingredient, has surged by 200% over the past year, according to Adobe Analytics, which tracks online retail prices. On global commodities markets, cocoa futures are down slightly in recent weeks after peaking above $12,000 per ton — a record — just before Christmas. Two years ago, they were less than $2,500.
Yes, cocoa prices are insanely high right now. So high, that chocolates are being stuffed with almonds, peanut butter, caramel -- whatever it takes to reduce the pure chocolate content and cheapen up the goodies. That must be why I can't find regular M&M's on the shelf and can only find the pretzel filled ones!
And this is all due to the big bad scary sun monster fueled by farting cows and your Toyota Tundra -- at least according to NBC News:
The historic price run-up just ahead of the chocolate industry's biggest day of the year has been months in the making. Disruptive weather patterns fueled by climate change have hammered West Africa, where most of the world's cacao, the raw form of the bean that gets processed into cocoa, is grown. Similar challenges have been mounting for coffee farmers, too, fueling a sharp price spike on global markets that consumers are increasingly expected to feel this year.
So we're blaming a three-year stretch of rough weather on man-made climate change? Is that what we're doing?
The cacao bean grows best in temperatures up to 89 degrees Fahrenheit and with annual rainfall less than 2,000 millimeters. In 2024, 71% of cacao-producing areas in West Africa experienced an average of 42 days with temperatures above that heat threshold, with some areas receiving 40% more rainfall than expected during the peak of the rainy season, according to a report released this week by Climate Central, a climate research institute.
Weird! I guess weather fluctuating from year to year and decade to decade has never happened before! I guess we gotta roll out global communism then!
And I can't leave here without showing you the expert prediction for future weather (which will undoubtedly come true, as predicting the weather is usually pretty easy).
Intensifying and more frequent extreme heat events and excessive precipitation are directly linked to global warming, as rising temperatures trap more moisture in the atmosphere. Climate scientists project excessive rainfall patterns to persist in West Africa through the rest of the century, while the entire continent warms 0.3 degrees Celsius faster per decade than the worldwide average.
Well, there you have it. A simple statement of FACT from NBC. Intensifying heat IS climate change! And it's also climate change when we have droughts, rainfall, and cold weather.
These are all related to the Manbearpig!
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