This article right here is an instant classic.
Honestly you guys, if you want to take masking seriously and "follow the science" you should definitely be putting pantyhose on your face.
For real!
This is not a joke!
It comes from a study out of the University of Cambridge.
The University of Cambridge!
Oh my, I just cannot wait to see my liberal coworkers show up to work with pantyhose on their faces. In fact, I might start the trend on Monday just for fun.
Here's some absolute gold from this wholehearted, extra-serious Vice article (can somebody tell me what happened to Vice?):
A better seal around the edges of the masks means more protection from COVID-19, but most consumer-level surgical masks and KN95s leave gaps around the sides. The researchers tested seven different hacks that attempt to close the gaps, on surgical and KN95 masks:
- Taping the edges of a mask to one's face
- Filling the sides of a mask with gauze
- Binding the mask to the face with gauze (the "mummy" method)
- Putting a knot in the ear loops
- Rubber bands around the front to create a "brace" against the mouth
- A slice of pantyhose wrapped around the face
Some of these people actually wrapped their heads in gauze. And they called it the "mummy" method.
AMAZING!!!
But in the end, it was putting a slice of pantyhose around your face that won out.
And why wouldn't it?
Isn't the whole idea of this science experiment to see what length of stupid people will go to in order to feel safe?
Sure seems like it...
Here's some more fun stuff for ya:
"For most of the hacks, comfort was a big issue," Eugenia O'Kelly, the paper's first author, said in a press release…
"The pantyhose caused high levels of discomfort as well as issues speaking and occasional obstruction of the eyes," the researchers wrote.
Somehow—and I'm not sure how—placing a surgical mask on your face and then covering your face in pantyhose causes "discomfort."
I can't imagine.
Okay, once again, this is a real article, it's not on The Babylon Bee, and these people actually want you to put pantyhose on your face.
Because Covid.
I can't...
I will say though, I'm really glad Vice put this article out on their website. The folx over on the Left make my job a heck of a lot easier.
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