The Vatican is opening a shopping mall to recover its financial shortfalls
· Mar 24, 2023 ·

Who needs to sell indulgences when you have pope swag??

The Vatican, which has made a few disastrously bad investments lately, has now decided to open up a shopping mall to cash in on that sweet pilgrim traffic.

The "Caput Mundi" mall is opening just outside St. Peter's Basilica and it's designed to be a revenue stream for the Catholic Church, which has been running a deficit for years now.

From Breitbart:

The new mall boasts over 40 boutiques featuring select Italian and foreign brands and includes clothing, accessories, jewelry, toys, cosmetics, and an exclusive and innovative food hall complete with a sushi bar.

So now when you and your family tour Rome, you can get there and roll up to St. Pete's in brand-new swag!

Pope Francis, the modern social justice pope, has called the Vatican a "poor church for poor people." But under his leadership, the Catholic Church is now going full corporate commercialization in order to make a little bit of its lost money back.

The mall is located on the top floor of a massive parking garage on Rome's Janiculum Hill built for the Jubilee Year of 2000, which previously housed a coffee bar and cafeteria for the busloads of tourists and pilgrims who arrive at the Vatican...

A Gasak spokesperson said the mall should become "one of the most important points of reference for shopping in the center of Rome, a boutique experience where the user feels he or she's at the capital of the world."

Just like Jesus would want.

There's nothing like shopping for gag gifts at the Vatican Spencer's Gifts, or getting a little bit of soap from the Bath and Body Works, before heading over to see God's representative on earth!

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