With friends like these, who needs enemies?

If I was a drunk, and all my friends did to support me was find ways to ensure that the places we go together can support my drinking habit, then those people aren't my friends.

Here's my list of 5 ways you can support your fat friends:

1. Tell them to turn off Netflix and go for a dang walk, then go on a lot of other dang walks.
2. Tell them to stop eating junk food immediately and invest in healthy protein.
3. Tell them they are going to die a slow, horrible death as their quality of life decreases over years of rolling health issues.
4. Tell them to go to church and get emotional support if they have spiritual issues that are feeding their addiction.
5. Get in the trenches and go on a dang walk with them.

Within a few months to a year, they won't be your fat friend anymore!