TIME selects Joe Biden and Kamala Harris as Person of the Year... two people who have literally done nothing this year.
· Dec 11, 2020 · NottheBee.com

It's that time of the year again when TIME Magazine reminds us that they still exist by releasing their person of the year issue.

It's a tough job, to look back at an entire year, especially one like this one, and select someone to receive an honor like "person of the year." With so many great options, you can imagine how crazy the decision-making process must have been.

I picture the editors of TIME all gathered around a boardroom table, printouts of pictures and names spread out in a wild mess, and the whiteboard covered with half-erased names and pros/cons lists. A box of day-old doughnuts sits untouched on a rolling cart next to a pot of cold coffee by the door. Everyone looks disheveled and tired.

Finally, the chief editor slams a piece of paper down and says, "Forget it! We're just going to go with Biden. That will keep both of our readers happy." Everyone nods in relieved approval. It's been a long week. They begin to gather their things to leave.

Just then, a hitherto silent executive with his chair turned around, facing out the window, quietly says, "No."

Everyone freezes. Their hearts sink. "Oh, no. We're back at square one again," they all think to themselves.

The exec spins his chair slowly around to face them and with a wry smile says, "Biden AND Harris."

The room erupts in applause.

And... scene.

At least that's how I picture it going down. How else do you explain such a lame choice?

TIME is quick to self-importantly point out that "Person of the Year is not an award — it is a marker. It is history as it's written, whether good or bad."

Whatever. 🙄

But of course, with all the great options out there, the left-leaning magazine chose two people who literally did nothing this year. Joe Biden and Kamala Harris.

Seriously, what have they done?!

Barely won an election (allegedly)? They haven't even been in positions of authority. They've just spent a year uttering platitudes and making promises. There are people who have ACTUALLY done things this year. Like IMPORTANT THINGS. But apparently, breathing while Democrat is the bar now for person of the year. Amazing.

I don't even want to get into the fact that they put Harris on the cover too. I'm just surprised she's not the one in the foreground. What VP has ever gotten this much attention before? The media is all but begging Biden to keel over at this point.

The really sweet thing though is that just about everybody, left and right, thought TIME's choice was stupid. People on the left thought they should have chosen BLM activists, people on the right thought perhaps someone that didn't hide in their basement during their entire political campaign would be a better choice. And countless people on both sides couldn't believe they didn't choose healthcare workers in general or, ya know, the folks who developed a vaccine in record time.

Nope. Biden/Harris.

Womp womp.


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