Thanksgiving can be tough if you're a snowflake. You got Uncle Bob over there talking Trump's 2024 run, Aunt Sue still refuses to use your preferred pronouns (tree/treeself), and, of course, there's the meat and dairy on the menu (gross).
Well, if you're a vegan on Thanksgiving, I have great news for you:
Thanks for sharing, Karen!
I'll make sure to have this number on speed dial on Thursday just in case cousin Tom shows up with those horrendous deviled eggs again. Those things, while I do remember them to be absolutely delicious, are just as their name suggests: THE DEVIL!!!
Here's some info on the hotline:
This Thanksgiving, The Oatly Emotional Support Hotline for Plant-based Eaters will offer unique resources for vegans looking for support during the challenging holiday. What happens when you call in? Well, you've got options…
Pressing one will get you to personal affirmations to help emotionally navigate a traditional meat- and dairy-heavy Thanksgiving dinner. Pressing two will get you to useful stats and talking points to defend your reasons for going vegan from a climate perspective.
Want to scream into a void about your frustrations about explaining your plant-based diet to people? Oatly gives you 30 seconds to do just that by pressing three.
Pressing four will get you to a locker room-style motivational speech inspired by — but not completely plagiarized from — the 1993 sports film Rudy.
Personally, I plan on pressing three all seventeen times I call in on Thursday.
Because there's nothing like a good scream to get it all out!
"BAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!" I'll holler when Uncle Bob brings up the turkey from the basement.
"I'M THANKFUL FOR VEGAN BACON CHEESEBURGERS!!!" I'll scream into my phone when it's my turn to say what I'm thankful for.
"THIS IS MURDER!!!!!" I'll bellow when mom cuts into the ham.
Just using my coping skills like my therapist told me to.
So if you or anyone you know is like me and hates Thanksgiving — just absolutely hates it — then Oatley's is here to help.
Happy Native American Heritage Day, folx!!!