A few days ago a lector at a Catholic church service in Philly finished doing her lector duties and walked away from the altar, seemingly unaware that a much larger lady was waiting at the bottom of the steps to deliver two stiff chops to her throat:

First thing's first, what little media is covering this assault is uniformly referring to these strikes as "punches." Categorically false. Look at the video and the picture above. These are straight up throat chops, Austin Powers style.

Second, what the heck is happening here? The white lady seemed to have no clue on earth what was coming her way, evidenced by the fact that she didn't even flinch as the first blow came her way. But the black lady was waiting there for her like she just knifed her car tires and stole her kid's lunch money. Bam, two throat chops and then cusses her out. She was mad.

Third, why throat chops? I mean, there's nothing wrong with throat chops, but it was certainly a calculated move, a specific attack. Two throat chops. The second was less effective but she was clearly going for another throat chop. Check the tape. Like, what lady goes for the throat chop over a punch or slap or a hair pull?

Fourth, look how the victim absorbs the blows and then just continues walking away like nothing happened. Doesn't even look back. She's just like "Welp, just got throat-chopped, what are you gonna do." Meanwhile the other white lady freaks out and bolts. But the throat chopee just continues on. That's a red flag. Either she was just in a state of shock and confusion OR she did something to deserve those throat chops and was just trying to play it cool knowing she got what was coming. Because who gets throat-chopped twice in front of a whole church and then just doesn't react at all?

There is so much going on in this little clip. I have so many questions. The people need answers.