The New York Times is a hilarious parody outlet these days, filled with Ivy League writers who might be more disconnected from their fellow man and reality than anyone who has ever lived.

But I usually pull the punches. It's gotta be hard to be a clown, after all. The life of a journalist must be exhausting, what with the triple masking and virtue signaling while the rest of us are enjoying apple pie, church, and sunshine. We should cut them a moderate amount of slack.

Today, however, is different.

This week, the NYT took aim at Bandit Heeler.

If you are familiar with the cartoon "Bluey," it's the best kid's show in decades.

If you haven't watched it, stop reading and go watch it.

Much of the series is a showcase for Bandit's virtuosic performances in his daughters' imaginative schemes. In subsequent episodes, he serves as their beleaguered hospital patient, beleaguered robot, beleaguered horse.

"Bluey" has been praised for its rare and complex depiction of parents, and Bandit has been commended as an exceptional father. Tribute is paid in Bandit Facebook groups, Bandit memes and custom Bandit fan merchandise. He is a fun dad who does housework, too. In one episode, he dances into the kitchen, shouts "What's up, party people?" and plops a basket of freshly folded laundry on the floor.

I don't know how he keeps house, works as an archaeologist and serves as a full-time prop artist to his daughters, but he does it all while only feigning complaint. He is not only a good father — he is a fantasy, one crafted to appeal to adults as much as to children.

Writer Amanda Hess indicates that she feels a prick of guilt as she ignored her kid while Bandit is ever present and engaging. She says typical Disney flicks showcase a dead parent, so Bandit throws her off.

Bandit's omnipresence is odd, and striking. He is like Mary Poppins, stitching together a family with creative prop work. Or he's the Cat in the Hat, leading children in controlled chaos while their mother is out. His closest analogues in children's media are not other parents, but the fools and tricksters that children encounter when they are allowed to roam unsupervised. Bandit represents a parent freed of drudgery, one whose central responsibility is delighting his kids.

Man, imagine a dad who is present with his kids. What a crazy idea!

Take my typical evening as an example. I usually finish 8-10 hours of publishing the craziest news on the internet, get the kids from school, help with dinner, manage our 6-month-old, do the dishes, wrestle with the kids, play hide and seek or tag in the yard, do a bit of laundry, then maybe sit down for a bit to enjoy some TV with my wife. I'm such a weirdo.

Bandit is my homie. But I guess normal dads are "odd and striking" now.

When I heard that Bentkey, The Daily Wire's conservative children's entertainment company, had created a transparent "Bluey" rip-off, I was curious what it would do with the dad. If Bandit is the idol of progressive fatherhood, what are the attributes and habits of his conservative doppelgänger?

See, she's already off the mark. Bandit isn't the idol of progressive fatherhood. This is a conservative news site and I'm one of those domestic extremists who believe our nation should follow God and acknowledge Christ is Lord.

Bandit is a father who understands what a father is meant to be, as defined for us by our Father in heaven. That isn't to say that the show or the characters are particularly religious, but the template for parenthood and marriage displayed in that Aussie show is, whether they like it or not, profoundly Christian.

With "Chip Chilla," conservative parents can fulfill a fantasy of their own, combating the perceived indoctrination of public school...

"Perceived indoctrination"

...by screening home-school-themed content afterward, featuring lessons about dead white people and classic texts. In "Bluey," the puppies lead the games, but in "Chip Chilla," it is the dad who is in charge, directing his compliant kids to role-play "Moby-Dick" and the fall of the Roman Empire. I suspect that Bentkey made Chum Chum the schoolteacher not because it's a modern choice, but because it puts male authority at the center of the show.

Someone's really upset with the idea of patriarchy, isn't she?

And therein lies the central point.

Male authority at the center of a show? Gasp! Especially male authority that understands that sacrifice and service, not chauvinistic bombast, is the peak of masculinity?

Imagine if we ordered a society that way. What kind of sick, horrible things could we achieve?

The perfect mother must be a lot of things, and few of them are very fun. The base line expectation of selfless devotion leaves little room for experimentation. This is why so many children's stories must get her out of the way in order for the child to experience risk, adventure, failure and growth. Dad can hang around through all of that, though. And if he does, he can be a star.

Amanda sounds like she's suffering from a lot of guilt and pressure in her role as a mother. Combine that with some resentment toward a father figure or the omnipresent "patriarchy" throughout society, and you get the toxic mix needed for a verbose NYT entry.

I don't know her, but if she were to read this, I'd let her know that it's okay that she's not the perfect TV mom. It's also okay that there are really good role models for kids and parents alike in characters like Chilly and Bandit.

After all, they aren't perfect. In one episode, the family goes on a beach vacation but Chilly can't relax. She wants her vacation to be perfect, whereas the kids are living in the moment, enjoying a bath in the hotel instead of swimming at the beach.

Chilly learns to accept that not everything needs to be perfect and in her control. This is a great lesson for kids and parents alike.

In another episode, the parents play with kids Bluey and Bingo on the beach, but Bandit is lost in thought. He's got something on his mind that he can't let go and he's distracted from his family as a result. His kids practice wadding their negative emotions into an imaginary ball before tossing it out to sea. At the end of the episode, Bandit imitates them and finally is able to be present and at peace.

These are great lessons, and they imitate life. My kids teach me just as much as I teach them. But I also need role models. I don't need another washed-up antihero or a dead-beat dad on screen. Hollywood is obsessed with telling us there are no heroes these days.

When I watch things, I want role models: Characters that inspire me to greatness.

Those characters point to the goodness of God and His image that lives within us.

And so, "Bluey" is a True Myth that guides us (IKYKY).

"Since it is so likely that (children) will meet cruel enemies, let them at least have heard of brave knights and heroic courage. Otherwise you are making their destiny not brighter but darker." - CS Lewis

It is true that at some point, moms must step out of the way in order to let their children grow. There is a natural progression from the motherly spirit of nurture to the fatherly spirit of adventure - kids who have moms that won't let them go are horribly messed up and their mothers devour their souls.

But this doesn't mean that the mother is alone in a "baseline expectation of selfless devotion." The character of Chilly isn't boring. She is a giver of life, a comforter, and a lightning rod to ground the crazy energy of her family. When Bandit takes the kids to the pool and forgets literally everything little kids would need on an outing (been there, done that!), she rescues them all. It's a great example of how men and women are different, how women help balance men, and how opposites attract!

There's a lot of pressure on moms to be perfect in our society, but there's also an expectation that fathers aren't needed or to be trusted. It's a weird mix.

Maybe, just maybe, if we learn to love our families like Bluey's family does, we'd learn the eternal lessons our Heavenly Father meant to teach us when he crafted His designs for marriage and parenting!

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