We've been covering the Hawaiian Feral Chicken War for years, but now a bunch of chickens are mysteriously dying and everyone's freaked out
ยท Nov 22, 2023 ยท NottheBee.com

The Hawaiian Feral Chicken War on the island of Oahu has been going on for so long that it's easy to forget there was ever such a thing as peace.

When we last covered the ongoing struggle, the contraceptive feed plan was failing and Honolulu was on the brink of surrender.

But now, chickens are dying by the dozens on Oahu's north shore and local residents are spooked by how quiet it is around their neighborhood.

Even the end of war still feels like war to them:

Born and raised in Sunset Beach, Richard Hoapili is used to waking up every morning to the sound of chickens.

But he suspects not everyone likes it.

"Lately there's been a lot of dead chickens around the neighborhood," he said. "The neighbor up the road buried I think 15 chickens."

"There's never been an amount like that of chickens dying and I've lived here all my life," Hoapili said, presumably with that familiar thousand-yard stare:

The years have been long and the war hard. One resident described the dying birds in the most graphic and battle-weary of ways:

"It's a horrid smell. It's a dead animal smell. Like dead cat or dead dog," she said. "It's awful. The rotting in our hot sun. Nobody likes that."

Even in death, the chickens are still fighting. The fighting never stops. The chickens, and the fighting โ€” those are the only constants on Hawaii.

Meanwhile, the media is out here making fowl puns.

Maybe the end is in sight. Maybe residents will, at some point, no longer have to fear the teeming hordes of feral fowl that roam freely over the island. Maybe.

Even the people who have been fighting this war seem conditioned to it. Indeed, in some ways, they even seem to be coming around to the chicken's side:

Now more and more people showing up, they don't like the idea that the chickens make noise super early in the morning. Go back to where you came from.

War is hell.


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