The title of the forthcoming book is "Beautiful Things," which I have to admit is probably better than my personal first choice, "Burisma and Me," which I envisioned as a heartwarming tale of a boy, a dog, and a corrupt multi-billion-dollar Ukrainian money-laundering enterprise.
NEW YORK (AP) — Hunter Biden, son of President Joe Biden and an ongoing target for conservatives, has a memoir coming out April 6.
Remember, this is the AP, they feel compelled to add "context" the better for you to understand that Hunter is a sympathetic character and Republicans don't raise legitimate issues, but rather "target" people.
The book is called "Beautiful Things" and will center on the younger Biden's well publicized struggles with substance abuse, according to Gallery Books, an imprint of Simon & Schuster.
It says something about your life when you choose to focus on drug abuse because it's the least of your problems right now.
Acquired in the fall of 2019, "Beautiful Things" was kept under wraps even as Biden's business dealings became a fixation of then-President Donald Trump and others during the election and his finances a matter of investigation by the Justice Department.
More useful context. Trump didn't bring up Biden's business dealings because it was a legitimate issue, he was "fixated" on it for unknown reasons (at least unknown if you tried to follow the story on social media) and really you just can't repeat that often enough although the AP does try.
The book has been circulated among some friendly authors including Stephen King, an extremely successful author known for having a real talent with words:
When Blabbermouth Don talks about who has the bigger nuclear button, I think we all know what he's talking about. It's your basic %&#@-measuring contest. Sad!
I heard "The Stand" was better.
Anyway, it won't surprise you that he loved the book. It might surprise you just how much he loved the book.
"In his harrowing and compulsively readable memoir, Hunter Biden proves again that anybody — even the son of a United States President — can take a ride on the pink horse down nightmare alley," King writes in his blurb. "Biden remembers it all and tells it all with a bravery that is both heartbreaking and quite gorgeous.
Interestingly enough, he left out "stunning." (Probably saving that for the book jacket.)
He starts with a question: Where's Hunter? The answer is he's in this book, the good, the bad, and the beautiful."
I'm not sure the justice department will find that a satisfactory answer when they come looking for him.
Hunter Biden is a lawyer and former lobbyist whose work helped lead to the first impeachment of Trump. Biden joined the board of the Ukrainian gas company Burisma in 2014, around the time his father, then U.S. vice president, was helping conduct the Obama administration's foreign policy in that region.
"...whose work helped lead to the first impeachment of Trump."
Okay, I have not heard that spin before.
According to the AP, Hunter wasn't engaging in corrupt influence peddling, he was playing 12-dimensional chess in an effort to bring down a sitting president!
Well, that certainly casts it all in a positive light!
Trump and others have insisted that Biden was exploiting his father's name, and they raised unsubstantiated charges of corruption.
Context! We could make a drinking game out of this.
Just give someone your car keys first.
The House of Representatives voted to impeach Trump in 2019 after learning that he had pressured Ukraine's president to announce it was investigating the Bidens. Trump was acquitted by the Senate.
Hunter Biden: Mad genius or just a devoted dad? You make the call!
Financial terms for "Beautiful Things," which was written in collaboration with the author and journalist Drew Jubera, were not disclosed. Biden and his publisher likely will face criticism from Republicans for his memoir, although books by presidential family members are nothing new. During Trump's presidency, son Donald Trump Jr. released two books, "Triggered" and "Liberal Privilege."
Anticipatory context now!
The AP is a veritable context factory, pumping out context like Henry Ford pumped out Model Ts (which were also all the exact same thing).
The publisher signed up a book last fall by a leading Trump supporter in Washington, Sen. Josh Hawley of Missouri, but dropped it in the wake of Hawley's support for the Jan. 6 protest that led to the violent siege of the U.S. Capitol by Trump supporters who wrongly believed that the president had been reelected.
Why is this in a story about Hunter Biden's new book?
I'm not going to say, but it starts with "con" and ends with "text."
Which when you break the word down like that, starts to make some sense.
If you can't wait until April and just have to read a memoir by a presidential relative with a substance abuse problem may I recommend a suitable substitute that should tide you over: