Oh look, Krispy Kreme is doing it again: They're nearly giving away their donuts!
On Friday, July 14, customers can score a dozen original glazed donuts for just 86 cents with the purchase of a regular-priced dozen donuts.
Now, you may ask yourself in wonder: "Gee, how is it that Krispy Kreme could afford to sell a dozen donuts for just 86 cents? That's just seven cents per donut!"
And I got the answer for you right here: Their donuts just aren't that good.
We all know it. You can admit it here. This is a safe space.
Yes, Krispy Kreme donuts are covered in a shimmering, microns-thin, explosively sweet sticky glaze. At first it seems incredible.
But then you realize that the only reason they go to all that trouble is to conceal donuts which are little more than like 1/3 of an ounce of lame yeasted dough. They have to douse it in all that sugar to conceal the fact that they made pretty much no effort to make a good base-level donut.
If your donut's no good, it doesn't matter what you do to dress it up, it's still gonna be a disappointment.
Dunkin' Donuts, on the other hand, is much better. I'm not saying they're a world-class donut. They're not. Most of their donuts sort of taste like they were made in Council Bluffs, Iowa, like two weeks ago. There's no denying it.
Still. The donut itself is better. Many of their donuts are of the superior cake-based variety, more fulsome, with a better texture. Even their more pillowy yeasted-style doughs are better than Krispy Kreme's, though. It just feels like someone took more pride in making them is all.
Plus, the Dunkin' coffee is way better than Krispy's. The Krispy Kreme coffee tastes like it's been sitting on a Hobart burner for 60 years. A Dunkin' cup of coffee isn't going to win any Good Food Awards or anything, but it at least tastes like it was made at some point after the Nixon administration.
And don't forget Krispy went all-in on the Rona vax hysteria:
