The soy-boy vegans over at PETA showed how truly uncreative they are by using ChatGPT to rewrite the first book of the Bible into a weird, slightly pantheistic, horribly blasphemous, but completely animal-friendly version of the holy book.
"The Bible has long been used to justify all forms of oppression, so we've used ChatGPT to make it clear that a loving God would never endorse exploitation of or cruelty to animals," says PETA President Ingrid Newkirk. "It took God only six days to create the entire world, but we realized it would take us years to rewrite the whole Bible, which is why we've started with just the first book."
Here are just a few of the problems their new version creates theologically speaking:
- Animals are now referred to as "beings" instead of "beasts" or creatures: equivalent to people and angels.
- God replaces Adam and Eve's plant clothes with different plant clothes, namely hemp and bamboo fibers, rather than providing them with animal skins as they leave the garden.
- While waiting for Isaac to be born, Abraham and Sarah become pet parents, adopting a dog named Herbie.
"As they walked with Herbie, Sarah and Abraham thought of the importance of adopting dogs from shelters and rescue organizations rather than purchasing them from breeders," PETA's version reads. "They spoke of how buying a dog or cat from a breeder or a pet shop contributes to the companion animal overpopulation crisis, as countless dogs and cats in shelters await loving homes while breeders continue to produce more puppies and kittens for profit."
And as a shadow of Christ, this bit of rewriting of the Mount Moriah sacrifice is particularly problematic.
Instead of God providing Abraham a ram caught in the bushes as a substitute for Isaac, God gives Abraham and Isaac a lamb, and they decide that the best way to "to show reverence and respect for God's creation" is to skip the whole sacrifice thing altogether and make friends with the lamb.
Which means no Jewish people, no Moses, no David, no Jesus.
And without Jesus, the offering of a sacrifice for our sins, and the hope of the resurrection, we‘d end up spending eternity like a bunch of Bothans sent on a rebel mission.
Luckily, like a lot of things ChatGPT spits out, this version is a lie. No one can write away God's story, not even an AI.
But if you want to read more of their weak attempt, PETA is selling digital copies of the animal-friendly Genesis on their website.
But I wouldn't give them the money for it.