This is the time of year for holiday princes, a season when women everywhere curl up with a cheesy Hallmark movie to dream about life with a royal from a non-specific European country that always happens to have a British accent.
One actual prince who's not being so dreamy this year is England's Harry, who has a new Woke proclamation in support of the environmental streaming platform WaterBear. The prince wants us all to know that this whole coronavirus shindig is one giant time-out from Mother Earth for our naughty behavior.
"At the end of the day, nature is our life source," said the prince. "Somebody said to me at the beginning of the pandemic, it's almost as though Mother Nature has sent us to our rooms for bad behavior to really take a moment and think about what we've done."
That's funny. I was under the presumption that the majority of people on this planet believe in a sovereign God who created all of said nature and controls how we live, move, and have our being.
I was also under the presumption that the 'Rona spread worldwide because of the evil government of China, faulty commie labs and unsanitary wet markets, and the Communist Party's attempts to hide the matter from the world through bribes and outright lies.
Silly me.
"[The pandemic has] certainly reminded me about how interconnected we all are, not just as people but through nature," continued Harry. "We take so much from her and we rarely give a lot back."
What's funny is that this attempt toward progressive enlightenment has led Harry and those similar to him (like the Pope) to embrace the same pantheistic thoughts that once dominated cultures throughout history.
Here's a definition of pantheism for you from Brittanica:
"The doctrine that the universe conceived of as a whole is God and, conversely, that there is no God but the combined substance, forces, and laws that are manifested in the existing universe."
And here's an expression of pantheistic thought direct from the Unitarian Universalist "Church." Try to make it through this without vomiting.
"We pray to you, Mother Earth, with gratitude, For your holding and sustaining love, For the air, water, and soil that feed us, For the mountains and rivers and oceans that calm our spirits, For loving and supporting all beings and all creation.
We pray to you, Mother Earth, with humility, Help us to remember our place in the great web of life, Help us to remember that we are but a part of this great web, and that we must do our part for all life.
We pray to you, Mother Earth, for forgiveness, For our ignorance and willful disregard of the damage we have done to you, to the air and the waters, and the soil and the life of this beautiful planet."
Lest you think this is a fringe position, my kid's preschool teacher has been teaching her students a song thanking Mother Earth for what she has given us. I've since clarified to my daughter that we should be thankful for what the Earth provides, but that our thanks should be directed at God, not at His creation.
Let's also not forget how those Union "Seminary" students were caught praying to plants last year:
It's only a matter of time before our culture legitimately begins making metal idols again and calls it "progress." What was it that Paul dude said about peeps "exchanging the truth about God for a lie," and worshipping creating things rather than the Creator?
But perhaps you believe I'm still being a bit unfair to Prince Harry. After all, it isn't wrong to care for the environment, right? It's not like he would create weird, poetical, pantheistic admonitions as the fundamental basis for his assertions, right?
"Every single raindrop that falls from the sky relieves the parched ground," continued His Royal Wokeness. "What if every single one of us was a raindrop, and if every single one of us cared?"
Prince Harry went on to indicate that his motivation for such views is a desire to leave a better place for his son and future generations.
"What is the point in bringing a new person into this world when they get to your age and it's on fire?"
The problem with the prince, like many well-meaning people, is that they believe two critical errors.
First, they believe this nonsense about being "raindrops" – i.e. that we could be educated to be good enough to create utopia – instead of the most-totally-observable-fact that we are totally depraved creatures who have no hope outside the intervention of a holy and loving God. Through their mechanisms, they always attempt to create a framework where we can save ourselves from sin.
Second, they believe that their cure for an issue like climate change is absolute, and refuse to tolerate a marketplace of ideas to tackle such a problem. Prince Harry could discuss how we might invest in say, clean nuclear energy, stopping the abortion of children who will bring new scientific understanding, lifting regulations meant to line politicians' pockets so innovation can flourish, educating farmers on better agricultural practices, or promoting smart incentives for conservation.
Instead, it always seems to come down to government mandates, population control, and poetic statements about being "raindrops."
A third critical error that tends to plague the celebrities of Wokeism is that they don't practice what they preach. Harry just recently purchased a $14 million dollar home in Los Angeles. I'm sure he has his reasons why he's living in opulence while telling you your daily commute is killing the Earth.
Even the far-left Piers Morgan slammed Harry for his words, pointing out that the prince's new crib has 16 bathrooms that could hold up to 72 million drops of water at the same time.
"I don't mind being a raindrop if it makes you feel better," said the British news anchor. "I'll be a raindrop for you.... I would just take the 'raindrop' lecture better if it didn't come from somebody who uses private planes and taxi service... it's something that really grates with me... actually be the raindrop you want to be."
Watch the spectacular argument Morgan had with his co-host over this issue here. Enjoy!