When they say they want to "save the planet," they are being very precise.
Make no mistake. They're not interested in saving you, just the planet.
And there is no better spokesman for this than the sallow Donnachadh McCarthy, who comes across as a combination Bond villain and medical-school cadaver.
I might be being too hard on him. It's not like he's a monster.
I'm not saying people should go out tomorrow and kill all of their pets.
What I'm saying is that if you don't need your cat or your dog for mental health reasons or for blind people...
Why, he's almost starting to sound like a humanitarian.
...you should seriously consider not replacing your cat once he passes away.
See, no big deal. We just need to abandon one of the most profound bonds a human being can experience, a relationship between man and animal that has endured millennia because if we don't, it's going to get a little warmer.
Totally worth it.
The host pointed out that anyone with a pet would argue that all pets provide benefits in terms of mental and physical health.
McCarthy was having none of it.
Well, people argue the same that cars are really useful and flying around the world is really useful.
That childhood pet you had, the beloved creature who taught you about life, love, obligation, and loss and in many ways made you the person you are today?
Pretty much like a Hyundai.
What we need to do is think in an emergency. We have to look at these essential needs and essential requirements.
I'm getting the impression that "happiness" is not considered to be an "essential requirement" for this green socialist paradise they are envisioning.
But then, it never is.
The host asked if she was correct in assuming he had no pets.
"I have had a pet in the past."
This was a lie. I know that because I did some extensive research consisting of listening to the very next sentence to come out of his mouth when he was asked what that bond was like.
My partner had a pet for three years and I noticed that when my partner was out the dog slept all day.
"I had no bond and never attempted to form one."
I can picture him standing over the dog, wincing with each exhalation, silently calculating the carbon impact, looking forward to the day when he'll be rid of this ecological catastrophe on four legs.
We took him out for a walk in the morning and the evening. When we visited his parents in the countryside the dog absolutely abandoned us and was mad with energy running around the other dogs all day long.
Not only does he know nothing about dogs, he apparently knows nothing about children, either.
You bring your child to a playground, he will absolutely abandon you and be mad with energy running around the other kids all day long.
However, you can be sure he'll come back when he's hungry or tired.
And so will a dog.
So what is he saying, we shouldn't have kids either?
He wasn't yet done displaying his ignorance.
What I realized that day was that millions of dogs are cooped up in urban homes and pining away for, with horrendous lives, they are pack animals.
Some dogs are not treated well, and could use more attention. Some, not so much. They are all different.
And yes, they are pack animals, but what McCarthy doesn't understand, because he doesn't understand anything about dogs, is that he was a part of that dog's pack, as was his partner.
And he was really bad at it.
But then, if you're going to be ignorant about a subject, might as well go all in!
I would argue that most people don't need pets.
Unsurprising that he would believe this but the arrogance is worth noting.
He doesn't "need" a pet, so neither should you.
The piece began with environmentalists‘ claims that a dog has the same carbon footprint as two SUVs driven 6000 miles a year or one average home.
If you are comparing a living creature to inanimate objects in terms of their "carbon footprint" you've already told us everything we need to know about your worldview.
There are two things you need to remember:
First, they aren't trying to save you, they are trying to save the planet.
You‘re just in the way.
Second, you should vacuum your dog.