Tampa Mayor Jane Castor is very angry. Some people dared show their faces in public at the Super Bowl without a mask.
Don't these people know there's a pandemic happening? If they don't wear a mask outdoors while remaining six or so feet from each other, they have a statistically negligible chance of catching this 99.9% survivable virus!
Don't they listen to sCiEnCE????
Mayor Castor (I'll let you figure out her political affiliation) said she is mobilizing the police to use video from the Super Bowl to identify people in the stadium and around the city who were not wearing masks during the festivities.
"I'm proud of our community but those few bad actors will be identified and the Tampa Police Department will handle it," said Castor, probably hiding her crayon-drawn plans for alligator swamp gulags behind her back.
Castor went on to lament how ignorant these stupid people living life in the face of history's least dangerous pandemic are.
"Everyone knows that simply wearing a mask dramatically reduces the spread of COVID-19. And I'm proud to say that the majority of the individuals that I saw out and about enjoying the festivities associated with the Super Bowl were complying. There just has to be that level of personal responsibility."
Well, there you have it folks.
You wanted to celebrate like a human being who's able to eat, drink, and talk with others without a face covering? Too bad. The police department is going to hunt you down and "handle" you.
There's only one problem with Castor's plan. Here she was at the press conference talking about hunting down the maskless villains:
And here she was in her prime seat at the Super Bowl:
Remember, wear a mask, you little people. But if I'm an elected Democratic official (or if I'm celebrating a cause that's on the right side of history, like our Lord and Savior Joe Biden's presidential win), then I don't need to follow such trivialities.
