Our friends at the US Consumer Product Safety Commission are up to their silly, probably drug-fueled hijinks again.
This Easter the feds are reminding us to be sure to wear helmets if we find ourselves on bicycles being chased by a rabbit roughly the size of an elephant.
Here's the announcement as well as a mini-fictional tale to go along with their warning.
If that doesn't get you scratching your head, here are some more oddities that the department has released lately.
Their recall email subscription service runs through the Squirrel Realm.
For the Trans Day of Visibility, they issued a warning about the war of the pigeons against the flying toasters going on in the skies above America.
Honestly, I'm not sure if they're standing in solidarity with the trans people or mocking them with that one.
Moving on, Handsome Ron wants you to remember to store cleaning products out of sight and out of reach of the kids.
And of course, let's not forget everyone's favorite, Vapor McJuicy, warning us of the dangers of liquid nicotine!
I'm not going to lie; I was kind of excited to see McJuicy was still around nearly a year after his debut:
Unfortunately, Quinn the Quarantine Fox is still hanging around too.
I'm glad our tax dollars are being spent on this.
I feel super safe with this Product Safety Commission at work.
