Hello all you tin-foil-hat-wearing, Qanon-following, Alex Jones-supporting conspiracy theory junkies. I'm gonna show you something, and I don't think you're gonna like it.

"Health codes turning red," aye?

Sounds a little, uh, suspicious, wouldn't ya say?

Let's take a looksie:

The depositors were planning to travel to the central province of Henan this week from across China to protest against an almost two-month block on accessing at least $178 million of deposits, which has left companies unable to pay workers and individuals unable to access savings.

Cool! A bank protest!

We're all on board with that, wouldn't you say, Lefties?

Protesting the bankers is like, what democracy is all about.

"OCCUPY WALL STREET!"

But wait…

Rights groups have warned China could use its vast COVID surveillance infrastructure to stifle dissent. Without a green code on their smartphone app, citizens lose access to public transport and spaces such as restaurants and malls, as well as the right to travel across the country.

Oh no. Don't tell me the loving Chinese government would really use a Covid passport to thwart a protest.

Not under Communism! Who could have guessed?

But what's this?!?

A man surnamed Liu, who lives in Hubei province, found that his health code turned red on the morning of June 12 after he registered the day before to travel to Henan.

Liu had planned to travel to a protest planned for Monday in the Henan provincial capital Zhengzhou, where he had hoped to get his money back. The protest would have been the latest among numerous such demonstrations in Henan in recent months.

More than 200 depositors were similarly blocked when their health codes turned red, according to members of a WeChat group.

It could not be ascertained if the change in code was intended to block the protesters or for another reason, but three depositors told Reuters they knew people who had registered to travel to Henan, who were not connected to the frozen funds, whose codes did not turn red.

No, no, no. It couldn't be!

You're telling me that under the Chinese model these Covid passports, vaccine passports—whatever you want to call them—are being used to protect the banking class?

That's awful.

But here, let me collect myself and my cognitive dissonance real quick.

I'd be willing to bet that the Chinese Communist Party is just looking out for the greater good of society here.

I'm thinking these protesters are right-wingers, or freedom lovers or something.

Yeah, that's probably it. They're probably out there chanting "make China great again," or something crazy like that.

You conspiracy theorists are always so cynical. The CCP isn't using these passports to control people. They're doing it for the greater good.

Sometimes you need the government to step in and keep order—especially with domestic terrorists.

Like when citizens try to kill off Supreme Court Justic—or I mean, like when people stormed the Capitol on January 6th. Yeah, January 6th! That's right.

And that's why we should mandate these same sorts of passports here in America.

Because in America, we too deserve the right to be free from ideas that don't fit the narrative!

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