Only in Oregon, man...

On Saturday a Beaverton woman left her 4-year-old in the car with the engine running for a sec while she went into the grocery store to grab some hot Cheetos and a cold pop or something. Maybe some grapes? I dunno, dude. The article doesn't say what she was shopping for.

Anyway, a car thief saw the running SUV and was like, "hey, free car." So he seized on the opportunity and drove off.

He didn't get far before he realized there was a straight up toddler in the back who was probably like, "hey, where are my grapes? Also, who are you?" So the thief was like, "hard nope," and pulled a U-ey to return the kid to the market.

So, kudos where kudos are due. That's a stand up guy for returning the kid to mom. But the next part is what's so funny about this story.

Before driving off again in his now kid-free car, this dude took a minute to give the mom an earful about the dangers of leaving kids unattended in cars!!

Officer Matt Henderson said, "He actually lectured the mother for leaving the child in the car and threatened to call the police on her."

He, A GUY IN THE MIDDLE OF COMMITTING GRAND THEFT AUTO, was gonna call the cops on her! 🤣

They found the car abandoned a few hours later in—you guessed it—Portland. But they still haven't found the thief.