Looks like beta males have a new hero!
As the husband of Vice President Harris, Emhoff has the title of second gentleman. With that comes a host of duties once performed by female spouses. But as the first man in this role, he is not only shattering perceptions of gender roles; he is also taking a sledgehammer to toxic masculinity.
Sledgehammer!
Sounds kind of masculiny, if you ask me.
Of course, the closest author Jonathan Capehart has ever come to a sledgehammer would be a Peter Gabriel Song but no matter.
When Emhoff and Harris married in 2014, he was a high-powered lawyer at a Los Angeles firm. She was attorney general of California.
He kept his job.
When Harris was elected to the Senate in 2016, Emhoff stayed rooted in California while Harris made the bicoastal commute.
He kept his job, didn't bother to move, and made her commute.
But when Joe Biden chose Harris as his running mate, Emhoff took a leave from his firm to hit the campaign trail. And when Biden and Harris won, Emhoff left the firm to be by Harris's side.
Oh, so now he's a feminist hero?
I would think most men, myself included, would support my wife were she to become one heartbeat away from the most powerful position in the world. What I wouldn't do, is use that as an opportunity to lecture everyone else about how I'm the real man and they aren't. Why?
Because that's not what a man does.
But it is what Emhoff does.
This is something I have thought about a lot, I've spoken about a lot. There's too much of toxicity -- masculine toxicity out there, and we've kind of confused what it means to be a man, what it means to be masculine.
Watching that video, I'm thinking probably not my first choice to have as the guy with me in the foxhole.
As I've said before, if you're spending a lot of time thinking about what it means to be masculine, you're not.
You've got this trope out there where you have to be tough, and angry, and lash out to be strong.
Let's take those last two first.
Who is saying this? You have to be angry to be strong? Lash out? What weird caricature of masculinity is this?
Actually I know. It's what weak men think is masculine because they confuse any kind of passion as "anger," and any kind of disagreement as "lashing out."
As for "tough," well... yeah. It's a tough world, and if you're not tough, you will be beaten down by it.
But that's not how Emhoff, the powerful entertainment lawyer, sees it.
It's just the opposite," he said.
The opposite? Do tell!
Strength is how you show your love for people.
No, not really. Showing love for people is great, desirable, and an essential part of a joyous life. But it's not "strength." You can do both.
He's not done yet, though.
Strength [which does not require you be "tough" according to Emhoff] is how you are for people and how you have their back. And how you stick up for other people and [push back] against bullies.
This can only be spoken by a man who's never actually had to have someone's back or push back against bullies, because if he had to, he knows you have to be tough to do that.
Let's just say, "showing love" is not going to cut it when your buddy just got jumped by some drunk in a bar.
Capehart clearly senses a need to demonstrate Emhoff's bona fides as a man and chooses this anecdote.
Emhoff famously jumped into action in 2019 when someone stormed the stage during an event Harris was doing. That moment is among many that show why Emhoff has become a popular part of the Biden-Harris administration.
Yes, but he did it by showing love.
Love of waiting until it was safe.
Let's review the sequence of events:
- Guy grabs mike.
- Woman (the host) confronts him.
- Another woman gets involved.
- Then a third woman.
- Then one, two, and three men before we see Emhoff "jump into action."
Capehart closes with this.
The full impact of his example might not be seen for a while, but he's starting to hit a nerve. Ever since his comments on toxic masculinity were publicized, conservative commentators have lost it. And channeling my inner Carrie Bradshaw, I can't help but wonder: Why are they so triggered by a man with the confidence to tell the truth?
The truth about what?
The entire piece, together with Emhoff's take on masculinity, is incoherent, at times simultaneously claiming that being "tough" is toxic masculinity and then attempting to demonstrate real masculinity with examples of toughness. That then fail.
Of course, when such people decry "toxic masculinity" what they really mean, what most are careful not to say out loud, is all masculinity is toxic.
Their vision of the new man, the ideal man, is a woman.
The world needs women. Badly. The world needs femininity. But it also needs masculinity. Why this elevation of femininity over masculinity?
