Not The Babylon Bee: Scientists rename birds to "shun racism," defeat white supremacy
ยท Nov 1, 2023 ยท


Oh my goodness, you'd think that was from The Bee!

But no, here we are over at Not The Bee in very real clown world.

The Washington Post has a more stoic headline that mirrors leftist groupthink:

WaPo notes, with great glee I'm sure, that the American Ornithological Association is going to be renaming "dozens" of birds because they were named after racists and slaveholders.

The group is no longer going to let birds be named after people at all, but there's a special focus on ridding the names of certain people.

The group said it will prioritize birds whose names trace to enslavers, white supremacists and robbers of Indigenous graves. Among them is one of the most famous birders in U.S. history, John James Audubon.

We're going back through the names of birds and if the person they were named for, often the person who discovered them, were "enslavers, white supremacists, and robbers of Indigenous graves" they're going to be getting a new name.

Because just like pumpkin spice, everything is racist. Even birds.

"There is power in a name, and some English bird names have associations with the past that continue to be exclusionary and harmful today," the society's president, Colleen Handel, said in a statement. "We need a much more inclusive and engaging scientific process that focuses attention on the unique features and beauty of the birds themselves."

Yes, when I think "scientific process," I think, "what would be the most inclusive and engaging way to name this discovery."

There are 80 names they want to change. And right now the society is working on putting together a committee in charge of changing the names from people names to descriptive names.

And I am sure it will be the most diverse and inclusive group to ever exist!

Erica Nol, co-chair of the society's Ad Hoc Committee on English Bird Names, said members took the issue seriously from the day the committee was formed more than a year ago. Meeting every two weeks via Zoom, they came up with a priority list of names to consider changing.

At first, the diverse White, Black and Latino members failed to arrive at a consensus. In addition to North American birds, they mulled changing the names of South American birds but eventually decided that it was not their place.

Months later, the members came to the realization that all eponymous names were problematic. "They imply possession of a species," Nol said. "They are overwhelmingly from a particular time and social fabric, they are almost all White men, few women, and women were almost all first names. Our main goal was to increase the birdwatching public."

They've been on this for THREE YEARS and finally came to a decision.

At first, they were going to just rename the birds named by "racists" but then they noticed that they were almost ALL named after WHITE PEOPLE!

Birds named for Audobon and other famous birders who chronicled the animals in North America will be renamed by a bunch of woke buffoons who are triggered at the thought of acknowledging the accomplishments of people born centuries before them in a different time.

"I'm sure there are going to be objections," (Birder Kenn) Kaufman said. "I'm sure the term โ€˜woke' will be used. I still don't know what that means. I just hope they can come around to see this from the view of groups of people who may have been marginalized in the past."

The whole reason they're doing this stems back to the Central Park Karen situation where a black birder got into an argument with a white lady who wouldn't leash her dog.

(Seriously, that's the reason behind this move. It all started then.)

And now we have a committee to rename birds because white people are evil and we have to erase all connection to the past.

Even the birds are racist now!

Rename everything!!

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