With conservatives like this, who needs liberals?
ยท Dec 14, 2023 ยท NottheBee.com

British commentator Ian Haworth is out here with an astute observation:

Yeah, that's swimmer Riley Gaines - you know, the married Riley Gaines - who rose to prominence for her defense of women's sports?

She's one of a number of "conservative" women who apparently posed for this "conservative" calendar made by "Conservative" Dad.

(We covered his beer brand when it released in April following Bud Light's Dylan Mulvaney debacle.)

More on the calendar:

Look, I know some of you are going to hate this, but you aren't conservative if you want to keep America in limbo between the time we got rid of God Almighty but hadn't replaced Him with the woke gods (somewhere around 1980).

If you want the "fast cars, beer, and naked women" America, that doesn't mean you're actually in the business of conserving anything. It just means you're on a slightly slower track toward chaos than the woke cultists are. Same values, less hive mind.

If you disagree, please explain: What about this is conserving anything?

(I've had to crop these for modesty's sake)

Peyton Drew

Josie the Redheaded Libertarian

The cross with Jesus on the last one is just the perfect cherry on top.

Feel free to call me a prude. I'll continue to maintain CS Lewis' observation in Chapter 2 of Mere Christianity ๐Ÿ‘‡

You can get a large audience together for a strip-tease act โ€” that is, to watch a girl undress on the stage. Now suppose you come to a country where you could fill a theatre by simply bringing a covered plate on to the stage and then slowly lifting the cover so as to let every one see, just before the lights vent out, that it contained a mutton chop or a bit of bacon, would you not think that in that country something had gone wrong with the appetite for food? And would not anyone who had grown up in a different world think there was something equally queer about the state of the sex instinct among us?

Lewis wrote those words over half a century ago, back in the times the non-woke crowd think they can return to.

I understand that not all the women featured in the calendar are Christian. My intention isn't to heap shame on them if they don't believe what I believe as a Christian. I understand that:

  1. The Right is actually more diverse in thought than the "diverse" Left
  2. Not everyone is a curmudgeonly Jesus extremist like me
  3. They are making fun of Dylan Mulvaney and the other men the Left keeps trying to convince us are beautiful women.

But this is Not The freakin' Bee, where we take flamethrowers to hypocrisy and ALL news that's too crazy for satire... WHEREVER we see it.

And even SNL knows there's a joke to be made here:

[This is a bit vulgar because it's SNL]

Seriously, talking about body parts is all you can do, SNL?

The joke is this:

"Conservative" Beer Company Releases Calendar Featuring Half-Naked Women In Sultry Poses

Here's the thing: If you're going to do a swimsuit calendar, maybe don't do it for a brand called CONSERVATIVE DAD that markets itself on FAMILY VALUES.

Even better, to CEO Seth Weathers, don't call yourself "Conservative Dad." Call yourself "Non-Woke Dad," because that's apparently what you are.

Be honest with your labels. Otherwise, the Left will have ammo to point out your hypocrisy, and you'll become the butt of the joke.

(PS - I want to note that Dana Loesch did a good job representing a modest take on a conservative calendar. Though AR-15s don't necessarily make one a conservative, they get you 50% of the way there!)


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