Today's 52nd issue of the Bee Forum News marks one year of weekly showcasing the funniest headlines on the Babylon Bee subscriber forum. Click here to read our first issue. Congrats to every Bee subscriber who had a headline published in the Bee Forum News this year - it's harder than it looks! There's so much more than bold reporting that happens on the forum, but if I told you, well...you know the thing. Join us to find out for yourself! But that's not all that happened this week....
Read on for exclusive headlines you will only see here on the Bee Forum News, because Bee subscribers see things no one else sees and say things no one else is brave enough to say, for some reason.
Top Headlines of the Week - headlines with the most upvotes by forum members:
Trump Threatens Groundhog With 25% Tariffs If Spring Doesn't Arrive Early @dontslowtheearth
RFK Jr Asked To Stop Doing Shirtless Pushups During Senate Confirmation Hearings @thebigfreeze
Dad Spends Weekend Coming Up With Gotcha Questions For Daughter's New Boyfriend @kirgol
Trump Designates June "American Pride" Month, Unveils Redesigned Pride Flag @buzzyboy
Awkward! Male Senators Keep Asking Tulsi Gabbard What She Likes To Do On A First Date @showquest
Kash Patel Promises To Investigate How So Many Idiots Have Infiltrated The U.S. Senate @neohillbilly
Taco Bell Employees Show Trainee Spot Where They Stomp On Orders Before Handing Them Out @twoplus2ischicken
Reporter Seen Frantically Googling 'How To Do Journalism' @drconservativeprof
Punxsutawney Phil Emerges Doing Trump Dance Predicting 4 More Years Of Leftist Tears @ruthiej714
Trumpy Bear Reminds Selena Gomez That Her People Won't Be Illegal After Trump Buys Mexico @alola_rychu
PETA's Groundhog Day Cake Reveals Six More Weeks Of Selena Gomez Tears @murf
Lizzo And Rapper Dank Demoss Release Rideshare App 'Heft' @annafillaxis
Trump Casts Out Pronoun But It Returns With Seven More @ohdear
Sometimes, really great headlines don't make it to the top so here are some of my favorites:
Trump Revokes Xi Jinping's Security Clearance @jasonsparks
Ibram X. Kendi Now Forced To Earn Living Selling Anti-Racist Essential Oils On Facebook @peoplesay
Schumer Asks Trump If He Could Leave Just Enough Illegals To Mow His Lawn @jakflak
Columbian Migrant Shocked His "I Am A Gang Member" Full Body Tattoo Detected By ICE @jasonsparks
AOC Demands To Know Who Will Pick All The Candy Corn @dolamroth
Lowe's DIY Project Comes With Three Months' Free Couples' Counseling @sault
DOGE Limits Babylon Bee To One Joke @milofarmer
RFK Jr Offers Bear Skin As Peace Offering To Pocahontas Warren @thebigfreeze
Confirmation In Chaos When RFK Jr Returns From Break With Cheetos Dust On His Shirt @kirgol
Kash Patel Promises He Will Not Restructure The FBI If 10 Righteous Agents Are Found @lionsarenotsafe
Bernie Sanders Revealed To Be Three Pfizer Lobbyists Stacked In A Onesie @cclaws
BONUS - One randomly selected headline:
Do you have breaking news to report? Join us! Who knows, your headline might get published or featured on the Babylon Bee homepage, or it could show up here in our re-cap of the top headlines of the week. Thousands more totally true headlines were posted this week on the forum, but sadly, only Bee subscribers can read them. You did get to read a few, though, so if you have a favorite, please let us know in the comments!
P.S. Now check out our latest video 👇
