Fire broke out in California last week burning forested hillsides, neighborhoods and swanky beachfront properties prompting Governor Gavin Newsom to announce his New Year's resolution to add more water to fire hydrants in the coming year. Brave firefighters have been doing the best they can trying to put out the raging inferno with ethically sourced paper fire hoses hooked to hydrants that were quickly drained of water. Newsom explained that climate change had caused the fire hydrants to go dry almost instantly, and that he would try really hard every day this year to fill up the hydrants so this would never happen again. He also assured newly homeless citizens that the fire would have been even worse if it hadn't been for his resolution last year to eat bugs every day to end climate change. But that's not all that happened last week!

Read on for exclusive headlines you will only see here on the Bee Forum News, because Bee subscribers see things no one else sees and say things no one else is brave enough to say, for some reason.

Top Headlines of the Week - headlines with the most upvotes by forum members:

• Frugal Wife Saves Money On Ice Scraper By Letting Car Warm Up For Three Hours @kirgol

• Firefighters In LA Struggle To Put Out Wildfires With New Environmentally Friendly Paper Hoses @dontslowtheearth

• Kamala Harris Starts Bail Fund For LA Fire Looters @showquest

• New York Times Fact Checked For Its Article Claiming Its Fact Check About Meta Throwing Fact Checkers Under The Bus Was Fact Checked By Fact Checkers And Found To Be False @dandillondev

• Morticians At Carter Funeral Keep Handing Biden Their Business Cards @drconservativeprof

• Insurance Company Rebrands As AllahState @babylonandonanon

• Obama And Hillary Having A Blast One Upping Each Other By Telling Biden What To Do Next @thebigfreeze

• Sad: DEI Mayor Who Thought She Was Chosen For Being A Black, Female Social-Justice Warrior Learns It's Because She's Retarded @priehle

• Scientist Confirm: Children Can Usually Hear You The First Time @nicalys

• Trump Sentenced To Work At Burger King @twoplus2ischicken

• Liberal In Burning Home Tells White Masculine Rescuer She'll Wait For Flabby LGBTQ Person Of Color Instead @ruthiej714

• LA City Council Passes Emergency Measure To Hire & Deploy Even More Diverse Firefighters @coachjoeconway

• The Science Is Settled: Perm Makes Zuck Based @annafillaxis

• Biden Scheduling "Fire Side Chats" @m5studios

Sometimes, really great headlines don't make it to the top so here are some of my favorites:

• Toddler Dad Renews Yearly ER Membership @jswag

• Biden Signs Executive Order Making It Permanently Illegal To Make America Great Again @muskymarlin

• Husband Surprised Wife Doesn't Want A Decorative Cannon @webidtheefarewell

• Local Mom Warns: "It Is Necessary That My Counters Get Messy, But Woe To The One By Whom The Mess Comes!" @littlejedi

• Mayor Warns Extreme Cold Across Chicago May Delay Hundreds Of Weekend Shootings @bushbaby

• Trump Renames Great Britain "Sad, Lame Britain" @baberahamlincoln

• Californians Rush To Put Up 'No Fire Zone' Signs On Their Houses @blindbucky1996

• Experts Warn Some Celebrities Could Only Be Left With Three Mansions If Wildfire Continues To Spread @tylermontgomery

• Kardashians Look Back At Calabasas And Turn To Pillars Of Silicone @annafillaxis

• Children Worried Dad Just A Heart Beat Away From Being In Charge @webidtheefarewell

BONUS - One randomly selected headline:

• Aiden Claims Climate Change Burned His Homework @jstraut

Do you have breaking news to report? Join us! Who knows, your headline might get published or featured on the Babylon Bee homepage, or it could show up here in our re-cap of the top headlines of the week. Thousands more totally true headlines were posted this week on the forum, but sadly, only Bee subscribers can read them. You did get to read a few, though, so if you have a favorite, please let us know in the comments!

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