Wow, they really are getting strict.

It's not as if you'll no longer be permitted to breathe, that would be ridiculous, of course.

You'll just need permission from the authorities, at least if you want to fly, or go to concerts, or a bar... okay, pretty much anything that doesn't involve staying home 24/7 and getting WAY too familiar with your cats' social lives.

As the doctor explained, she has "always been in favour of people having choice."

Up until now.

"A big difference here is that breathing is an offensive weapon if you are infected with Covid."

Possibly a dramatic reenactment of Covid breath:

She made the comments,

...when asked about compulsory vaccination.

"Compulsory vaccination." You know, with an experimental vaccine all of which are being administered under some form of "Emergency Use Authorization" which in no way should give you pause. In fact if you suggest that despite happily taking every other vaccine before this you have some questions about this particular one you are an anti-vaxxer, and if you ask to see the safety data you are anti-science.

But not to worry, Jarvis says you have, a "range of options."

For example, you could contract Covid instead!

She did argue, however, that those who haven't been vaccinated could provide proof of Covid-19 antibodies if they had already been infected with the virus and received a negative test result instead...

And why would you need this government-approved documentation?

No big deal, just,

...to gain access to bars, sporting events, and other places.

"Other places."

See, you have all kinds of options if you want to leave your house.

Except for the freedom thing.

Prime Minister Boris Johnson angered Brits this week after he suggested that pub landlords could potentially choose to ban unvaccinated people from entering and said the "concept of vaccine certification should not be totally alien to us."

Well, in a free society it would be, but, yeah.

It all kind of makes sense if you think about it and have been drinking like I have.

We used to think we had rights to free speech, and religion and in the United States, to keep and bear arms, but now that we know that those are merely privileges granted to us by the state and not rights it follows we'd need the proper papers to breathe in public.

By the way, has anyone else noticed that the time between a ridiculously over-the-top satirical Babylon Bee story and an eerily similar story landing here has started to compress?