Topping the charts as this week's winner for next-level intersectionalism, we have Amazon's new Cinderella reboot and a fairy "godmother" played by a gay black man!

Can you hear all those glass ceilings shattering?

Or maybe that's just the sound of all worthwhile stories dying a slow and agonizing death.

Billy Porter, the actor playing the iconic role, will be known as "Fab G" in the film, which seeks to d̶ ̶e̶ ̶s̶ ̶t̶ ̶r̶ ̶o̶ ̶y̶ modernize the Cinderella tale as a pop musical for release on Amazon Prime Video this September.

Screenrant notes that Porter is "known for his lavish, gender-bending fashion and colorful personality" and that this role "is based on his real-life personality."

Here's how Entertainment Weekly put it:

"Porter continued to shape the character — a supernatural being who stands for being true to oneself, and who transcends mundane human labels. "Billy articulated the idea [that] magic has no gender," says [writer-director Kay] Cannon."

Someone please tell me I'm dreaming and that is not an actual sentence I just read.

Let me point out that Cinderella has largely been a children's story in popular culture, meaning this is a gender-and-sexuality-bending narrative set to catchy pop songs that's at least implicitly directed toward kids.

Hollywood wants to keep pushing the woke agenda through stories. Fine, but can they not do it at the expense of all existing stories? Does every fairy tale need a gender-bending magical creature?

If only the woke could make their own stories. Alas, that is a statistical impossibility since true art imitates life, and therefore must have some grounding in objective truth, beauty, and morality.

The scariest line in Screenrant's writeup?

"If this film turns out to be a hit, there could be multiple sequels announced in the very near future."

Bibbidi, bobbidi, boo!