Trump's "new social platform" is pretty much just a personal blog, but wokies lost their minds at the news anyway

May 5th

A few months back, we were promised a new social platform that would make social media great again: an experience with lots of words and only the best words.

At the time, Trump Senior Advisor Jason Miller said this platform would "completely redefine the game" of social media.

While I can't conclusively say there isn't something else in the works, this is what we got:

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The page is, in essence, a blog where POTUS 45 can sound off on important issues. There are buttons to share the posts to Twitter and Facebook and a heart button that sadly doesn't work no matter how many times I mash it.

No interaction or commenting or anything though.

Hey, I don't blame Trump for wanting to communicate with his supporters and the nation – especially since Big Tech thought they could preserve freedom and democracy through censorship of elected leaders – but I think the promise of "completely" changing the social game was just a tad overhyped.

Then again, it's hard to compete with an amazing social platform like Not the Bee!

As usual, the fact that Orange Man Bad did anything infuriated the woke, who secretly are glad there's an official place to get angry at Trump again.

I can only assume CNN's newsroom will be switching immediately to 24/7 analysis of Trump's definitely-not-tweets.

Since Don is a master of trollery, I have to wonder if making the woke mock and rage again isn't half the point.

I kinda hope his new corner of the internet takes off like wildfire, if only so I can sit back and watch the ensuing madness of people so triggered by his words!


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