Let's take a moment and get our bearings.
The Iowa caucuses are barely over. Trump has taken a commanding lead in the Republican party.
The Democrats are still trying to paint him as some kind of unholy amalgamation of a bond villain mixed with a gator-wrastlin' buffoon.
All this sequel is really missing is a Chinese virus capable of wiping humanity from the face of the earth, or at least locking us all down for a couple of years anyway.
Cue "SARS-CoV-2-related Pangolin Coronavirus GX_P2V(short_3UTR)," which is a terrible name for our sequel.
How about we call it Covid II: Trump's Revenge?
The plot of Covid II opens in an unnamed Chinese laboratory. All we know for sure about the laboratory is that it's definitely not the Wuhan lab where the first virus escaped from.
"The 2024 study does not appear to have any ties to China's Wuhan Institute of Virology, which was the center of lab leak theories surrounding the COVID-19 pandemic."
Inside the laboratory, tiny mice that have been genetically altered to be more human like have been injected with a new gain-of-function COVID-19 virus.
Within seven days, 100% of the mice's eyes have turned completely white.
Within eight days, they have all died.
The deadly virus is a mutated version of GX/2017, a coronavirus cousin that was reportedly discovered in Malaysian pangolins in 2017 — three years before the pandemic. Pangolins, also called scaly anteaters, are mammals found in warm areas of the planet.
All the mice that were infected with the virus died within just eight days, which researchers noted was a "surprisingly" rapid death rate.
Professor Francois Balloux, an epidemiology expert at University College London's Genetics Institute slammed the research as being scientifically totally pointless.
He went on to say,
"The preprint does not specify the biosafety level and biosafety precautions used for the research.
"The absence of this information raises the concerning possibility that part or all of this research, like the research in Wuhan in 2016-2019 that likely caused the Covid-19 pandemic, recklessly was performed without the minimal biosafety containment and practices essential for research with potential pandemic pathogens."
Rutgers University professor of chemistry and chemical biology Richard H. Ebright concurred.
Calm down there, doc.
Just to be clear, we haven't reached the part of the sequel where some Chinese lab employees pick up the virus at a nearby wet market eating bats, nor the part where Democrat leaders shut down their cities just before the election.
Who knows, maybe this sequel will have a twist in it, and it won't play out like that at all.
I guess we'll have to wait and see what the science says we should do.
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