A few weeks ago, the Washington Post lamented that, due to useless COVID masks finally coming off, men would start demanding women to smile "again." Adam Ford even gave a hilarious live-read of the article on "Episode 4" of his podcast!

I regret to inform you we've uncovered more of these prophetic feminist writings that foretell the trials and tribulations women shall face once again in the workplace: Next up is "mansplaining."

"Most women have their own 'mansplaining' story — a term that refers to instances when a man explains something to a woman in a manner regarded as condescending or patronizing," writes Soo Youn.

"[M]ansplaining has long been a backdrop of navigating the world. As more Americans return to the office, they will once again more frequently face mansplainers in the casual and formal interactions of daily life."

Please note the key words in that definition: "regarded as." In other words, whether it's just regular explaining or "mansplaining" is up to the "victim," I guess. And, of course, if someone claims victimhood, we shouldn't dare question the truth or validity of his/her/xer claims.

So, it counts as mansplaining if someone says it is on behalf of the victim. That's all it takes.

By the way, what do we call it when a woman explains something in a "condescending or patronizing" way? Is there a term for that? How about we just call it speaking.

Let's take a look at an example of one of these horrible instances of mansplaining.

"Eugenia Yun was just making small talk with a co-worker at a previous job," Youn writes. "[S]he was explaining that she had recently been too busy to make kimchi, the pickled cabbage that's a staple in Korean American homes."

"Then, Yun said, a White male colleague interjected himself into the conversation, telling Yun that he knew how to make really good 'authentic' kimchi — which Yun had been doing regularly for two decades, using a recipe from her husband's grandmother. He said he had learned from a friend."

Could it be the co-worker heard another co-worker talking about a dish he also had at least some knowledge? And could it be the co-worker just wanted to participate in the conversation in a non-patronizing and non-condescending -- and even helpful -- way?

Granted, there are subtleties in interpreting tone in conversation. So, Yun is the only one that would be able to report that. However, there's nothing written that explicitly and obviously categorizes the male colleague as this so-called "Mansplainer," even though the term is dumb in the first place.

"'He was going on about how you need to salt it. He didn't really go into details, I'm guessing because he didn't know the details,' Yun said."

Wow, Yun... Don't you think that's a bit condescending and patronizing of you to assume he didn't know the details? Oh, wait. He's a "White male," so apparently it's okay to assume the absolute worst of him (at least that's what this handy-dandy intersectionality chart tells me).

As a whiny feminist (a.k.a., a feminist), you must assume the worst in men. The author of this article quotes a Harvard professor on the psychology of "mansplaining," who says it is "an often unintentional and byproduct of a patriarchal culture."

Here's where we get down to the nitty-gritty, or maybe I should say the nitty-cringey?

"Men have been brought up to believe that their thoughts matter," [the Harvard professor] said. "They need and deserve feedback, so that they can become more influential, better team members, better contributors."

Wow! Who could've known that? You must need an Ivy League education to figure out that one!

I have some questions for the Harvard professor, though: do women not think "their thoughts matter"? Do women not "need and deserve feedback"? Do women not want to "become more influential, better team members, better contributors"?

Lastly, the article gives us some tactics for the next time you're in the crossfire of workplace "Mansplaining."

Tactic #1: ask questions of the alleged "Mansplainer."

"In the moment, a bit of kind inquiry, good questions, can make a big difference. Pause and ask as if you really wanted to know the answer in a thoughtful, curious way," the Harvard professor said.

This is an interesting tactic, considering you'd have to ask the mansplainer to explain more! Ahhhhh!

Tactic #2: "just straight call it out."

"One thing women can do is just straight call it out. That's why I think having this term mansplaining is really important," said Tonja Jacobi, a professor at Northwstern Pritzker School of Law.

Tactic #3: "amplification."

Jacobi suggests this tactic was made famous by women in the Obama White House, in case you want to worship the Obamas like a good Woke person.

"The strategy was originally used to combat another situation common to women — suggesting an idea that goes ignored, then having it acknowledged or praised when a man repeats the same idea later. But the general principle also works for mansplanations," Jacobi said.

Thank you for 'splaining this to us, O wise feminists. I just have one last question: According to Wokeism, what is a man, and what is a woman?

Please get back to me on that as soon as you can. Thank you.