Mayor Ted Wheeler goes full Rambo on Portland protesters.
· Dec 10, 2020 · NottheBee.com

Ted Wheeler is mad as heck and he's not going to take it anymore!

Having won reelection with a thunderous 46% of the vote, he has a clear mandate to behave almost like a full-grown man.

Check out this brutally passive-aggressive tweet including a savage jab at Seattle "summer of love" mayor Jenny Durkan that you might miss because it's kind of subtle.

"There will be no autonomous zone in Portland."

Remind you of anything? Yeah, I was thinking the same thing.

Okay, fine, we're grading on a curve here. This is the West Coast, after all. Yes, Ted Wheeler looks pretty tough compared to Durkan but so would Justin Bieber and most members of the Amish community.

Let's just say that if Ted Wheeler were to shake hands with Rambo, his testosterone levels would double.

That all said, the man is definitely feeling his oats and went on an epic tweet drizzle Tuesday over the occupation of a property that had long been foreclosed on but caught the attention of the social justice warriors because a black and/or possibly indigenous person hadn't paid rent there for years.

"We all agree."

It's the law now.

"There's a housing crisis, a health care crisis, an education crisis, an employment crisis, a mental health crisis, and an addiction crisis."

When everything is a "crisis" nothing is.

Which reminds me, I had a "seasoning crisis" last night when I couldn't find the salt shaker. It was only through the shared sacrifice of all stakeholders involved that we were able to alleviate it but mostly my wife told me where it was.

One does wonder who could possibly be responsible for all these crises in Portland. Definitely not the mayor for the past four years.

Probably Donald Trump.

It takes a special kind of courage to parrot obligatory talking points.

"C'mon guys, you're making me look bad!"

And then he went there, dropping a Bureaucratic Bomb on their heads: Protocols were followed, papers were properly filed, signatures were provided, toner was replaced.

Boom.

And then he went full high school principal on them:

In case you were wondering, here is the occupied house in question.

They are protesting "gentrification."

So far, so good!


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