What a time to be alive.

On the plus side, this training program was an internal production, so probably a real money saver.

Let's go through this horror show, staring with the creative team behind it, because there certainly was a lot of creativity involved.

Not only do they list their pronouns, but their race as well, or at least the race they identify as.

Which is not in any way to be confused with racism. Seeing people as a race rather than an individual is the new anti-racism which is a lot like the old racism only with "anti-" in front of it.

So, nothing at all alike.

You have to wonder how long it will be before they are required to list their political ideology as well. You know, are you a Marxist, a Leninist, a Maoist, a Stalinist, a Trotskyist, part of an honest effort to ensure all viewpoints are represented.

All valid viewpoints.

The teachers subjected to this training had to first go through the now-ritual acknowledgement that they occupy "ancestral lands," and "traditional territories" of the Puget Sound Coast Salish People who absolutely did not engage in any kind of war or slavery or conflict among themselves like humans everywhere did since the dawn of time, as far as you are going to be told.

You are warned early on that your "lizard brain" may "freak out," which is what the lizard brain is supposed to do to protect you against people spouting complete nonsense and also sabre tooth tigers.

That's right, ignore your amygdala.

Listen to the nice lady instead and comply.

Now that you've been properly worn down, time to recognize that your heritage and everything about the country you live in is awful.

Yes, slavery was a common feature everywhere in the world petty much forever and still is including Africa, and you could therefore argue that everything was to some extent built with slave labor but shut up about that right now.

While recognizing slavery you also need to recognize things that are not slavery for some reason, including the fact that "brown people" are currently willing to climb border walls for the chance to pick strawberries so you can make a smoothie which is not a gratuitous classist swipe at you since what else are you going to do with strawberries.

"For others, it's time to bankrupt your privilege in acknowledgement of your thieved inheritance."

That amygdala is starting to tingle again. Bankrupt my what now?

"Sure, do whatever you need to do to sleep at night,..."

Closing my eyes usually works.

"...but also consider who you want to be when the morning light finds you."

I'm going to consider not being Saeed Jones because he does not sound at all happy.

By the way, this picture they used of Jones in their presentation?

That's the exact same look I had when I read that passage.

We really are all one people aren't we?

Someone should probably let Jones know.

"Spirit Murder"

This is essentially a rebrand of old-style racism in which you are treated differently and so discouraged from excelling or even trying.

Gets your attention, doesn't it? It's particularly helpful in that unlike real murder, there are no hard statistics to disprove your claims.

Real racism does still happen, and anecdotal evidence is available. "Spirit Murder" is intended to turn that into something endemic, so that you can brand all white people as racists and murderers.

I can't think of a better way to bring us all together or celebrate the enormous success, unparalleled in human history, that America has made in becoming a genuine land of opportunity for all races.

So, murder it is!

"Black Excellence."

It is very important that we never speak of "Individual Excellence," or suggest that people of all races, black, brown, white, and so on, are capable of such excellence as that would imply that we are not defined by the color of our skin which would make this entire presentation kind of silly.

That would just be rude. They clearly put a lot of work into it.

PowerPoints don't make themselves, people.

"Focus on social justice in the classroom"

It's very important that we turn our classrooms into indoctrination centers for the new and improved anti-racism racism.

Newly empowered by a sense of fear and resentment, we can now send our teachers out into the community to preach the gospel of Saeed Jones.

How have you served the state today?