This summer's fashion lineup is called "Dirtbag Glamour" and it looks like a bunch of bros who mixed women's clothes with thrift store rags

Feb 23rd

Anyone who's looking to refresh their wardrobe with the latest summer fashions could be forgiven for waiting for next year's releases:

Today, as we long for the denouement of a time characterized by assiduous applications of Purell, few things are as attention-grabbing as looking unclean. At least that seems to be the case made by many of the spring 2022 men's collections, whose standout pieces share a trashy, torn-up aesthetic that feels explicitly queer, both in its distressed androgyny and in the peculiarity of how much these garments cost despite being proudly scruffy.

Oh, yeah, sure. "Explicitly queer...distressed androgyny...proudly scruffy." Just the sort of thing normal, productive people want to drop $950 on.

If you need some sharp visuals of what all the weird kids will be wearing next June, consider Celine's Spring/Summer 2022 "menswear" lineup:

Here are some of the dazzling highlights:

Feeling playful? Consider a mashup between late 1980s Axl Rose and an early 2000s Avril Lavigne music video!

Want to go for that broody, introspective look? Opt for an outfit your angry poet sister would've worn in protest to a Thanksgiving dinner in 1998!

Looking for an air of authority? Consider dressing up like an alt character from the hit 2001 GameCube video game Super Smash Bros. Melee!

Heck, just go with whatever this look is supposed to be!

If you really want to dazzle them, go ahead and suit up in what I think is literally the exact same sequined bathrobe worn by the serial killer Buffalo Bill in that famous scene from Silence of the Lambs (you know the one)!

Summer is gonna be a year of fashion to remember, there's no doubt!


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