As the 'Rona vaccine rolls out of deep freezers and toward a hospital near you, one man has bravely risked a 0.01% chance of death by courageously giving up his vaccine shot for you and grandma.
That man is Pfizer CEO Albert Bourla – just a charitable soul who has absolutely nothing to gain from being the first to get this vaccine to market.
When asked Monday if he had taken the vaccine, Bourla said no, explaining that there are bureaucratic rules to follow after all.
"I haven't taken it yet and we are having an ethical committee dealing with the question of who is getting it... Given that there are very strict allocation rules that the CDC has voted [on], we are very sensitive not to cut the queue and get vaccinated before."
Bourla went on to say that "none of the executives and board members will cut the line."
What noble, altruistic souls!! What benevolence!
When talking about the plebeians, however, this completely unbiased man assured average Americans that the vaccine was "developed without cutting corners" and that we just need to "trust science."
As a disclaimer, let me say I have no reason to think Bourla is acting nefariously, but his excuses are complete weaksauce.
At least he did acknowledge that his taking the shots would instill greater confidence in the vaccine.
"People will believe much more [in its safety] if the CEO gets vaccinated," he said.
Out of the overwhelming concern Bourla has for health workers and the elderly, however, he might let a few million nurses and grandparents get the shot first.