This German doctor teaching his colleagues how to fight off knife attackers with TOWELS is amazingly on-brand and I can't stop laughing

Annie Oakley

Feb 18, 2025

Are you looking to keep the blood in your body while mostly-peaceful people attack you? Boy do I have the class for you!

AMAZING.

Me watching that video:

This clip involves medical staff from Leverkusen Hospital outside of Cologne, Germany. It was posted in October 2024 along with a news story that bragged about the training. 👇

From that story:

Marc Busche is not only chief physician for plastic surgery, he has also been doing martial arts for more than 30 years and leads the violence protection training at the clinic.

I have obtained exclusive footage of Dr. Busche as a child:

The climate in the hospital has definitely become rougher in recent years, he says. For example, patients or their relatives become aggressive because they find the waiting time in the emergency room too long.

HMMMM.

So in recent years, patients are stabbing doctors with knives because the ER wait time is too long?

I WONDER WHY THIS PHENOMENON IS OCCURRING.

If only we had a trained class of investigators who could find out what sorts of people are going on these stabbing rampages!

So, to protect the doctors from the knife-wielding migrant jihadis, this hospital is teaching the docs to wield towels like Jason Bourne.

Security services at clinics make sense, said the chief doctor, but if a patient suddenly left, it would take too long to be on site. That is why the Leverkusen Clinic has been offering violence protection training for about two years. Initially, the focus was on training the staff in the emergency room, now the courses are being extended to all employees.

They've spent TWO YEARS teaching medical staff how to fight off angry Muslims with towels.

Yo, Germany: There's a much easier way to delete bad guys!


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